It was no surprise to me when I found out my husband and I speak and understand different languages. Sure, we’re both fluent in our Americanized version of English, but when it comes to communicating love, we’re about as different as two can be.
Someone recently recommended that I read the book “The 5 Love Languages” by Gary Chapman. For fun, I went to the book’s website and took the quiz that determines what your love language is. Mine is “words of affirmation,” which, again, was no surprise.
As Chapman explains in the book, one naturally speaks and understands their love language. For me, that means that a daily dose of being told what an awesome wife I am is far more important than date night or a kiss before work. It also means that I can dish out encouraging words like nobody’s business.
My husband couldn’t care less. “Words of affirmation” is his lowest score out of all five languages. He neither speaks nor understands the language. So, no matter how many well-intentioned words I send his way or how often I fish for compliments, he continues to believe that occasionally saying, “Hey, beautiful,” should be enough of a compliment to tide me over.
On the other hand, my husband’s preferred language of “quality time” (the language of movie and card nights) is as much a mystery to me as my language is to him.
When it comes to the language of love, we’re polar opposites. And yet we’ve been joyfully loving each other for five years. The secret? Straight-forwardness.
I’ll throw out a “Tell me how awesome I am, would you?” and he’ll issue a “We never do anything. Let’s play a card game.” And no matter how little we understand what the other is saying, we still care.
Someone recently recommended that I read the book “The 5 Love Languages” by Gary Chapman. For fun, I went to the book’s website and took the quiz that determines what your love language is. Mine is “words of affirmation,” which, again, was no surprise.
As Chapman explains in the book, one naturally speaks and understands their love language. For me, that means that a daily dose of being told what an awesome wife I am is far more important than date night or a kiss before work. It also means that I can dish out encouraging words like nobody’s business.
My husband couldn’t care less. “Words of affirmation” is his lowest score out of all five languages. He neither speaks nor understands the language. So, no matter how many well-intentioned words I send his way or how often I fish for compliments, he continues to believe that occasionally saying, “Hey, beautiful,” should be enough of a compliment to tide me over.
On the other hand, my husband’s preferred language of “quality time” (the language of movie and card nights) is as much a mystery to me as my language is to him.
When it comes to the language of love, we’re polar opposites. And yet we’ve been joyfully loving each other for five years. The secret? Straight-forwardness.
I’ll throw out a “Tell me how awesome I am, would you?” and he’ll issue a “We never do anything. Let’s play a card game.” And no matter how little we understand what the other is saying, we still care.