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If you wouldn't say it to someone else, why do you say it to yourself?
No Caption - photo by Wendy Jessen
You know those mean, nasty, negative little things you say to yourself all day? The ones about your weight, looks or perceived failures that you berate yourself over?

Now imagine saying those same things out loud toward someone else. Did that change your perspective?

Several women were asked to write down the thoughts they had about themselves throughout the day in a notebook. Their thoughts were collected and turned into a dialogue between two actresses.

The original women were asked to come back to have some coffee...where they were about to overhear a conversation between the two actresses--straight from their notebooks:

  • You look very drawn today.
  • With your little baby teeth, you look like a mouse.
  • Your face looks like a bulldog's.
  • You've got lines going from your nose down here.
  • And you've gotten fatter as well. It's terrible...
  • Sit up straight otherwise your belly looks big.
  • Your arms are too big, your silhouette is all squished.
  • Don't you feel horrible right now? With those large thighs and horse's hips?
  • I wish I could see you with a normal least once.
One woman interrupts. "It's a little harsh what you're saying to her, isn't it?" And then another, "Hey girls, it's very violent to say that. But yes, it's what I say to myself all day long. Now, I get how violent it is!"

The video concludes, "If it's not acceptable to say it to someone else, why say it to ourselves?"

The dialogue we offer ourselves is often the most harsh and critical thoughts we have throughout the day. The negativity seems relentless, yet, we believe it without question. We need to stop the thoughts, "I'm too fat/thin," "I can't..." "I wish I were prettier/smarter/more talented." These thoughts damage only us and we don't deserve them.

Equally horrible, do you want your daughters, granddaughters, sisters, nieces or friends thinking this way about themselves? Would you even allow them or someone else to say something so horrid?

Stopping the negative self-talk is vital. Read this article about "fat talk." Also, see what happens when women in different cities have to choose average or beautiful.
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