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Mother has no idea her baby survived abortion 30 years later they meet face-to-face
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She was shocked to discover she had a daughter she didn't know about. - photo by Melinda Fox
Melissa Ohdens mother had no idea her baby survived the abortion. At 31 weeks pregnant, she spent five days getting a saline drip which poisons the unborn baby to death. After the drip, the abortionist induced labor and advised his patient not to look because the dead fetus would be too hideous. The mother left the hospital believing her child was born dead.

However, her baby Melissa Ohden was still alive.

Ohden told NewsTalk, (T)here was a utility closet there at the hospital (with) buckets of formaldehyde (where) they would place a living child like me, if we survived. They would put the child in the bucket, write the name of that child on the bucket, and they would be left there to die."

But Ohden was lucky; two nurses decided her life was worth saving.

As soon as she was born, nurses rushed her to medical care. Even so, Ohden had to fight for life in her damaged body. She said, "I had severe respiratory and liver problems... I suffered from seizures for an extended period of time. The doctors just really made it clear early on they didn't think I would live." But somehow, she did live.

Ohden was adopted and by age five she was given a clean bill of health with no health complications or mental disabilities.

She grew up knowing she was adopted, but it wasn't until Ohden was a teenager that she learned the truth about her birth. Understandably, Ohden took this news hard. In fact, while she acted like she wasn't affected by the knowledge that her biological mom tried to abort her, Ohden was deteriorating inside. She wrote:

"The world felt like it stopped spinning the night I learned that I was an abortion survivor. I was angry and scared, and I felt ashamed and guilty for living. Every little emotion you can feel, I felt that night. I was in pain for many years after that. As a teenager, I developed bulimia and turned to sex and alcohol to cope with the pain. My parents never realized how much I was hurting, though, because I was great at hiding it. From an outsider's perspective, I was the perfect kid."

The only way that Ohdem was able to recover from the pain of her history was by choosing to forgive her biological mother and herself.

Forgiveness is a huge part of my journey," she told The Blaze, "Accepting that I am who I am and I dont need to be ashamed of that truly set me free. And I think thats something a lot of people can relate to you try to run away from something difficult or painful, but you just cant. And my faith is what saved me from that. God put me on this journey and Im thankful.

This healing journey lead Ohden to search out her birth parents. The process was arduous and Ohden was only able to find them through an accident: Although HIPAA requires names be blacked out, for some reason, the hospital sent Ohden a copy of her medical records with her parents' names on visible.

Ohdem tried to reach out to her birth father, but he passed away before they were able to make contact. After years of searching and a few years of email and phone communication, Ohdem was finally able to sit down with her birth mother, face-to-face.

Of the experience Ohdem said,

It was better than anything I ever expected, but at the same time it was probably more difficult than I expected only in the circumstance that I knew she was hurt by what was done to her. But to look in her eyes and to see how much pain it caused her... I don't think I was prepared for that look in her eyes.

Ohdem learned that her mother hadnt wanted to abort her baby. The abortion was forced by her parents. In fact, it seems Ohden's mother's signature was forged on the consent forms.

Ohden said, "(My biological mother) has lived with so many regrets, the biggest one being that she never ran away from her parents. Now I'm grateful to have an opportunity to share our story with the world in the hopes that no other woman and child will go through what we've experienced."

So today, Ohdem has become a voice for the voiceless, spreading awareness and teaching about failed abortions as well as providing support for abortion survivors.

Read her story in its entirety and in her own words, here in "You Carried Me: A Daughter's Memoir." This is an affiliate link. If you choose to buy it, we may receive a portion of the revenue at no cost to you.
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How to avoid 'sharenting' and other paparazzi parenting habits
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A recent study revealed parents often spend up to two hours staging a single photo of his or her child to post online. - photo by Amy Iverson
Before having kids, some people just dont appreciate their friends baby posts. But after having a child of their own, three fourths of new parents jump right on the parental social media bandwagon. If you have become a member of this group, there are some rules to follow for posting responsibly.

Much of a parents worry is how to teach their children to use social media responsibly. We talk with our kids about privacy, oversharing, and setting restrictions on their devices to keep them safe. But parents themselves need to look in the digital mirror once in a while. Before having children, it doesnt take as much effort to think about what to post online. Its up to us to decide what we share about our own lives. But once you become a parent, there are many questions to think about regarding what is appropriate to post about your kids on social media.

In a recent survey, kids clothing subscription company Mac and Mia surveyed 2000 new parents to find out how they are documenting their kids lives on social media, and what concerns they may have.

First of all, people without children seem to feel a bit differently about the onslaught of baby pictures online than those who are parents. 18 percent of people say before they had kids, they were annoyed by their friends baby posts. But after having children of their own, 73 percent admit they post progress pictures of their little ones every single month.

Not only are new parents letting the world know each time their baby is a month older, but they are posting about their kids every few days or so. Men and women report they post 6-7 times per month about their baby.

And while 70 percent of new parents say the benefit of using social media is how easy it is to help family and friends feel involved, there are some downsides. Here are a few tips to avoid the pitfall of becoming paparazzi parents.

Dont miss the moment

In the Mac and Mia survey, some parents admitted to spending up to two hours to get the perfect shot of their baby. That seems a little extreme. New and old parents alike should be careful about spending so much time taking pictures and videos that they dont enjoy the moment. Years ago, I decided to never live an experience through my phone. A study by Linda Henkel, a psychology professor at Fairfield University in Connecticut, found that when people took pictures of objects in an art museum, they didnt remember the objects as well as if they simply observed them.

This photo-taking impairment effect can happen to parents as well. If we are so consumed by getting the perfect photo, we can miss out on the moment all together, and our memory of it will suffer.

Dont forget about privacy

60 percent of couples say they have discussed rules and boundaries for posting their babys photos, according to the Mac and Mia survey. Even so, men are 34 percent more likely to publish baby posts on public accounts. If parents are concerned about their childrens privacy, keeping photos off of public accounts is a given.

In the Washington Post, Stacey Steinberg, a legal skills professor at the University of Florida, and Bahareh Keith, a Portland pediatrician, wrote that sharing too much information about kids online puts them at risk. They write that all that sharenting can make it easier for data thieves to target out kids for identity theft. Check that your privacy settings are where they should be and never share identifying information like full names and birth dates.

Dont be paparazzi parents

36 percent of parents say they take issue when their childs photo is posted online by someone else. Responsible social media users will always ask permission before posting a photo of another child. But parents should also think about whether their own children will take issue with their own posted photos a few years down the road.

When parents are constantly snapping pictures and throwing them on social media, it can be easy to forget to pause and make sure the post is appropriate. I always use the billboard example with my kids. I ask them to picture whatever they are posting going up on a billboard in our neighborhood. If they are okay with that, then their post is probably fine. Parents should ask themselves this same question when posting about their children. But they should also ask themselves if their child would be OK with this post on a billboard in 15 years. If it would cause embarrassment or humiliation, it might be best to keep it private.

Once children reach an appropriate age, parents should include them in the process of deciding what pictures are OK to post. Researchers at the University of Michigan surveyed 10- to 17-year-olds and found children believe their parents should ask permission more than parents think they should. The kids in the survey said sharing happy family moments, or accomplishments in sports, school and hobbies is fine. But when the post is negative (like when a child is disciplined) or embarrassing (think naked baby pictures or messy hair), kids say to keep it off social media.
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