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How a stable home life can help prevent mass violence
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It may sound like common sense: Kids brought up in stable household are less likely to exhibit violent behavior. But after the Orlando nightclub shooting, more experts are examining the link between domestic violence and mass violence. - photo by Chandra Johnson
In the wake of Junes horrific shooting at a night club in Orlando, Florida, many terms were used to describe the shooter Omar Mateen, including angry, homophobic, racist and, given his self-identified allegiance is ISIS, terrorist.

But one moniker attached to Mateen after the shooting is sticking with some researchers: wife-beater.

Given the scale of Mateens crime and the confusion surrounding his motives (some family members contended he hated homosexuals, others say he was simply a terrorist), the idea that Mateen had a history of domestic violence might not seem as significant as some other details of his past.

But for experts like executive director of the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence Ruth Glenn, domestic violence is an oft-overlooked red flag for bigger acts of violence. The coalition defines domestic violence as a pattern of intimidation or control that ranges from physical, psychological or emotional abuse or assault.

Terrorism is a need for an individual to have power and control. Sometimes it plays itself out in domestic violence, sometimes its a mass shooting, or sometimes terrorism, its the same mentality, Glenn said. Its not just the domestic violence victims we might be protecting if we address this possible connection. Once a person who thinks like that has lost control, theres no telling who can get hurt.

While mass shootings with body counts like Sandy Hook (Connecticut), Orlando or Columbine (Colorado) are still statistically rare, its telling that so many perpetrators of mass violence have ties to domestic violence or relationship problems, said Salamishah Tillet, University of Pennsylvania associate professor and founder of A Long Walk Home, a Chicago-based nonviolence advocacy organization.

She pointed to Tucson, Arizona, shooter Jared Loughner, the Washington, D.C., sniper, Boston Marathon bomber Tamelan Tsanerav and many others as examples of mass violence perpetrators with connections to domestic violence.

Our goal is to curb systemic violence within the home as a way of changing the larger culture of violence outside the home. Domestic violence is a kind of springboard like that, Tillet said. If youre trying to figure out how to moderate mass violence, this is a good place to begin.

How strong the connection is between domestic violence and mass shootings or acts of domestic terrorism like Orlando will undoubtedly be the subject of some research in the future. But for now, experts say Americans need to reframe how they think about domestic violence not just as something that happens in bad relationships or behind closed doors, but as a warning sign to wider acts of violence.

We know that men who commit violence often rehearse and perfect it against families first, said Pamela Shifman, executive director of the equality nonprofit group the NoVo Foundation. By ignoring the impact of domestic violence in our understanding of public violence, we deny ourselves an opportunity to address the wider epidemic of all violence in this country.

Inside out

While experts point out that acts of mass violence or terrorism are unique, with different factors like mental health or abuse contributing to each incident, they do know one thing for certain: Violence begets violence, whether it's a person perpetrating the violence or a child witnessing the violence.

For a large number of American men, violence is often seen, learned and perfected at home before it manifests in crimes outside the home later on.

Violence tends to be first experienced in the home and the home is often a training ground for later actions, Shifman said. It is often the root justifier of all violence.

A 2007 Washington State study examining more than 300,000 domestic violence offenders found that domestic violence was the greatest predictor of future violence among men. Categorized based on age, the subsequent offenses committed and past criminal activity, a majority of men in every category committed felonies later in life following a domestic violence conviction.

A 2003 study published in the Journal of Interpersonal Violence found that boys who experienced domestic violence in their childhood home were four times more likely to perpetuate it themselves.

While no research has conclusively linked domestic violence to acts of mass violence like rampage shootings, Johns Hopkins Bloomberg School of Public Health associate professor Shannon Frattaroli said many acts of domestic violence qualify as mass shootings under the FBI definition, which sets a minimum of four or more people dying in an incident, excluding the shooter.

Until very recently (domestic violence and mass shootings) occupied two separate places in peoples brains. Were gaining an appreciation for the fact that these two types of violence are not unrelated, Frattaroli said. Those arent the kinds of mass shootings that dominate the headlines, but if you look at mass shooters and how often did they demonstrated themselves to be violent at home, its not uncommon. A fair percentage are family related.

In fact, its estimated at more than 50 percent.

According to a 2014 study conducted by gun control advocacy group Everytown for Gun Safety, more than half of the 110 mass shootings that occurred between July 2009 and July 2014 included the murder of an intimate partner or a former or current spouse. Everyown's study also adhered to the FBI's definition of "mass shooting," but the distinction varies by interest group.

Media outlets like The Washington Post and the website shootingtracker.com, for example, use a broader definition of four or more people killed or injured in an incident, while the Congressional Research Service defines such shootings as four or more people being murdered in the incident.

And sadly, both being a victim of domestic violence and the likelihood of being fatally shot by an intimate partner are common in the U.S. According to the FBI, a woman is fatally shot by a partner, spouse or ex-spouse every 14 hours in America. The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention states that 1 in 3 women and 1 in 4 men have been victims of physical violence by an intimate partner within their lifetimes.

As of this writing, the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence reports that there have been 357 domestic violence gun-related homicides since Jan. 1.

To many experts, the connection between gun violence and domestic violence is clear but how to address it is more elusive.

Ripple effect

Experts recognize that nothing will ever completely stop either domestic violence or gun violence, but many agree that getting guns out of homes at risk for domestic violence is a good start to combatting community or mass violence.

If we take guns out of the equation and not the rate of violence doesnt change at all, weve still done a good thing, said Dr. Garen Wintemute, director of the Violence Prevention Research Program at UC Davis. What that does at a minimum is it reduces the consequences of the violence occurring.

You live to fight another day, so to speak, in the absence of a gun, said Deborah Azreal, associate director of the Harvard Youth Violence Prevention Project. The only intervention against gun fatality that has a strong empirical basis is reducing access to guns.

Some states, like California and Connecticut, have already stepped up their laws to prevent in-home gun violence. Each state has a version of whats known as a firearms restraining order. The details vary by state, but generally, law enforcement, a victim or a family member can petition a judge to confiscate guns from the home of someone who is exhibiting violence toward themselves or others until the court can better evaluate the situation.

While some critics argue such confiscation is an infringement of Second Amendment rights, Wintemute says the goal is to de-escalate the situation temporarily, hopefully saving lives in the process (to date, no filings have yet been made under the California law).

Enforcement is also an issue. Restraining orders are all well and good, Wintemute said, if the law dictates that law enforcement must collect existing firearms. Currently, California is the only state that expressly states that in its restraining order law.

Frattaroli pointed to a common sticking point for many gun control advocates as an example background checks for people purchasing a gun.

If someone is prohibited from buying a gun, someone must forward that information to the database, which doesnt always happen, and thats only if a person goes to licensed firearms dealer and not on the private market, Frattaroli said.

Others say regardless of whether gun control is effective, its a Band-Aid approach to a problem that begins and ends with a strong, safe home life.

Its almost like theres this public and private split between violence, that somehow domestic violence is different from other violence, Tillet said. We have to think about violence more expansively to see the ripple effect that very often starts in the home.

Until families are safe and democratic, society will not be, Shifman said. You have to address one before you can the other.

National Crime Victimization Survey results since 1973 found that married women with children suffer half as much domestic abuse as nonmarried women or single mothers and children of divorced or never-married mothers are at least six times more likely to be the victims of abuse.

Paris shows that you can have many more guns laws (than the U.S.) but not necessarily stop the evil-doers from getting a gun on the black market, said University of Denver constitutional law professor Dave Kopel. If we looked at 17-20-year-old men in prison right now for violent gun crimes, I think wed find it very rare that they grew up in a stable home with their biological father. Strong families are and continue to be the ultimate foundation of society in many ways. This isnt any different."
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How to avoid 'sharenting' and other paparazzi parenting habits
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A recent study revealed parents often spend up to two hours staging a single photo of his or her child to post online. - photo by Amy Iverson
Before having kids, some people just dont appreciate their friends baby posts. But after having a child of their own, three fourths of new parents jump right on the parental social media bandwagon. If you have become a member of this group, there are some rules to follow for posting responsibly.

Much of a parents worry is how to teach their children to use social media responsibly. We talk with our kids about privacy, oversharing, and setting restrictions on their devices to keep them safe. But parents themselves need to look in the digital mirror once in a while. Before having children, it doesnt take as much effort to think about what to post online. Its up to us to decide what we share about our own lives. But once you become a parent, there are many questions to think about regarding what is appropriate to post about your kids on social media.

In a recent survey, kids clothing subscription company Mac and Mia surveyed 2000 new parents to find out how they are documenting their kids lives on social media, and what concerns they may have.

First of all, people without children seem to feel a bit differently about the onslaught of baby pictures online than those who are parents. 18 percent of people say before they had kids, they were annoyed by their friends baby posts. But after having children of their own, 73 percent admit they post progress pictures of their little ones every single month.

Not only are new parents letting the world know each time their baby is a month older, but they are posting about their kids every few days or so. Men and women report they post 6-7 times per month about their baby.

And while 70 percent of new parents say the benefit of using social media is how easy it is to help family and friends feel involved, there are some downsides. Here are a few tips to avoid the pitfall of becoming paparazzi parents.

Dont miss the moment

In the Mac and Mia survey, some parents admitted to spending up to two hours to get the perfect shot of their baby. That seems a little extreme. New and old parents alike should be careful about spending so much time taking pictures and videos that they dont enjoy the moment. Years ago, I decided to never live an experience through my phone. A study by Linda Henkel, a psychology professor at Fairfield University in Connecticut, found that when people took pictures of objects in an art museum, they didnt remember the objects as well as if they simply observed them.

This photo-taking impairment effect can happen to parents as well. If we are so consumed by getting the perfect photo, we can miss out on the moment all together, and our memory of it will suffer.

Dont forget about privacy

60 percent of couples say they have discussed rules and boundaries for posting their babys photos, according to the Mac and Mia survey. Even so, men are 34 percent more likely to publish baby posts on public accounts. If parents are concerned about their childrens privacy, keeping photos off of public accounts is a given.

In the Washington Post, Stacey Steinberg, a legal skills professor at the University of Florida, and Bahareh Keith, a Portland pediatrician, wrote that sharing too much information about kids online puts them at risk. They write that all that sharenting can make it easier for data thieves to target out kids for identity theft. Check that your privacy settings are where they should be and never share identifying information like full names and birth dates.

Dont be paparazzi parents

36 percent of parents say they take issue when their childs photo is posted online by someone else. Responsible social media users will always ask permission before posting a photo of another child. But parents should also think about whether their own children will take issue with their own posted photos a few years down the road.

When parents are constantly snapping pictures and throwing them on social media, it can be easy to forget to pause and make sure the post is appropriate. I always use the billboard example with my kids. I ask them to picture whatever they are posting going up on a billboard in our neighborhood. If they are okay with that, then their post is probably fine. Parents should ask themselves this same question when posting about their children. But they should also ask themselves if their child would be OK with this post on a billboard in 15 years. If it would cause embarrassment or humiliation, it might be best to keep it private.

Once children reach an appropriate age, parents should include them in the process of deciding what pictures are OK to post. Researchers at the University of Michigan surveyed 10- to 17-year-olds and found children believe their parents should ask permission more than parents think they should. The kids in the survey said sharing happy family moments, or accomplishments in sports, school and hobbies is fine. But when the post is negative (like when a child is disciplined) or embarrassing (think naked baby pictures or messy hair), kids say to keep it off social media.
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