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Did you marry out of your league? Turns out you're not alone
The idea that there are simply people too far above you, either in their looks or in their smarts, to date has been a staple of romantic comedies since the genre was first invented. - photo by JJ Feinauer
The idea that there are simply people too far above you to date either in their looks or in their smarts has been a staple of romantic comedies since the genre was first invented.

In Edmond Rostands classic play, Cyrano de Bergerac, for example, a talented poet is so self-conscious about the size of his nose that he worries the woman he loves may never love him back. He develops elaborate plots to woo his love without revealing his embarrassing proboscis. Their souls are perfect, but, alas, their looks are unequal.

But according to a new study, Rostands protagonist may have had nothing to fear.

There is no out of your league, the study purports. At least not when we consider one specific element of a relationship: Time.

Time, according to the findings of Lucy L. Hunt, Paul W. Eastwick and Eli J. Finkel, has a funny way of helping people fall in love. While those who married after knowing each other for only a short amount of time were found to be more assortative, those who were friends with their spouse well before they got married were more likely to marry someone considered out of their league, so to speak.

In other words, time really can make a person more attractive, Fusions Taryn Hillin wrote in response to the study. That conclusion seems fairly logical, but its pretty interesting how often this concept appears to play out in the real world.

So what does that mean for those looking for love? According to some, such as Mics Nicolas DiDomizio, it means that in the long run, hotness isnt everything.

Anyone who's been on a Tinder date with someone with a super hot profile photo, only to realize they are the literal worst in person, knows this all too well, DiDomizio wrote.

However, there is one important caveat. As The Huffington Posts Leigh Wengus wrote, the time trick only works if the two of you are legitimately compatible. Time, in other words, can be a medicine, not a magic wand.

Its still a gamble, Hunt, who is the lead author of the study, told Wengus. Getting to know someone over time can either improve that person's impression of you or worsen it.

Still, the power of time in helping to cultivate strong and lasting relationships cannot be overstated. According to The New York Times report on the study, 33 percent of men and 43 percent of women answered yes when asked if they had ever fallen in love with someone they did not initially find attractive.

The key factors in changing their minds, according to the Times, were things like great conversations, common interests and sense of humor.

So in the end, its not the league that matters, but the ability to connect on a level beyond first impressions.
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