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Maintaining a healthy self-imagewhen you dont love your body.
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Is it possible to love yourself when you don't like your body? Yep, you can. - photo by M. Elizabeth Wilson
Like most people, I have struggled with loving my body over the years. When I was young, I was too thin. After kids, I was too fat. As I grow older, my laugh lines have started to leak together, and the bags under my eyes look like Im packing for a long trip. My knees have arthritis, and I havent had a thigh-gap since the Dukes of Hazzard were on TV.

I wouldnt say I hate my body, but there are some things I would definitely change. There are even some things that make me feel self-conscious. These things influence my body-image or the way I feel about my body. But do I have to wait until I love my body to have a healthy self-image?

No! And neither do you. Here are a few things to remember that can help you feel great about yourself, no matter what.

You are more than your body. I had a conversation with a woman recently who has more physical troubles than anyone deserves. Tears streamed down her face as she shared how she felt about herselfweak, worthless, a failure. All because of her body.

I was able to tell her this simple truthshe is more than her body.

Within our body is our soul, everything that makes us, well, us. Our body is the shell that covers and protects us, but it doesnt define us; it isnt the totality of who we are. C.S. Lewis once said, You dont have a soul. You are a soul. You have a body.

We are so much more than what our physical eyes can see. You are so much more. You are strength, love, kindness and goodness. You are laughter and warmth, healing and inspiring. You help, hold, lift and laugh. You are beautiful, of great worth, and it has nothing to do with your body.

A smile replaced the tears of this sweet woman as she began to see how truly spectacular she is. She is on her first step from the bondage of misplaced self-value.

Stop saying Should. In our minds, we have a picture of how we should look or be like. There are a few problems with saying our bodies should look or be a certain way.

Often times the should is not realistic. We think we should look like the people on the magazine covers or look like we did in high school. We often dont take into account our age, circumstances, and, well, reality. We cant look like the people on magazine covers because we dont have an airbrush or photoshop in our closet. Were not supposed to look that way.

Having healthy goals for our bodies is good, but often these shoulds arent simply goals but can cloud the way we feel about our bodies.

Change what youre looking for. I dont think Ive ever woken up and thought, I wonder how many awful things I can pick out about my body today. Most people dont do that. But, it comes easily, almost reflexively, as we stand in front of the mirror. Our hair is too straight or too curly. Our eyes are crooked, our nose is too big. We are too short or tall, too thick or thin. By the end of a ten-second look over in the mirror, we can concoct a list of negatives as long as the line outside Walmart on Black Friday. If we base our feelings of self-worth on this list, it would be nearly impossible to see ourselves in a positive light.

But what if we changed what we are looking for? Rather than looking for what we dont like about our bodies, try looking for what you like about you. Look at the good you do. Look at the difference you make. Look at the gifts and talents you have, the joy you bring to others. That is beautiful. You are beautiful. And it has nothing to do with your body.

Take care of your body. When we realize our body doesnt define us and learn to change our focus to who we are and not what we look like, it is easier to love our bodies no matter what they look like. And when we love our body, its easier to take care of it. This may sound strange, but be your bodys friend. Treat your body with kindness. Give it what it needs. Good, healthy food. Ample sleep. Exercise. Flattering clothes.

As you take care of your body, it will take care of you. You will feel better about your health, your appearance and yourself.

Its whats on the inside that counts. When my husband and I were dating, he said, Youre pretty, but dont let it go to your head. Beauty fades. Bodies change. Its whats on the inside that counts. At first, I was offended. But over the years I have grown to love his comment. As my body has changed in size and appearance, his view of me hasnt. I have never felt fat or ugly around him because that simply isnt what matters. He sees me as beautiful because of what is inside.

What is inside of you? Beauty, would be my guess. No matter the size or condition of your body, your real beauty and worth come from what is inside. Its like your soul I mentioned earlier. If we make it a priority, our inside will only become more beautiful. Thats what counts.

A healthy self-image is key to our happiness and well-being. When we focus on what really matters and treat our bodies right, we can feel good about ourselves no matter what we look like.
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Have You Seen This? Street musician slays with clarinet
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Better than almost every face-melting guitar or drum solo. - photo by Facebook video screenshot

THE BIG EASY — Yeah, yeah, we all know that New Orleans is stuffed to the gills will incredible musicians.

But knowing that fact and then hearing that fact are two different things. You can step into any number of jazz clubs on any given night on Bourbon Street, and you’ll probably be impressed with virtually every act. Or you can sit at home on your comfy couch and watch this featured video.

In the video, you’ll see a woman who is in the groove. She is swinging hard, and wailing on her clarinet with a practiced expertise that makes it sounds so easy.

From note one you’ll be drawn in; your appreciation will grow with every second, and then your face will melt off when you realize how incredible she really is.

If you’ve never played a woodwind or a brass, you may not know everything that comes with a performance like this. Lung capacity and breath control are huge factors in keeping your notes clear and loud, and hitting those high notes is especially difficult.

So when this woman hits that high note and holds it for several seconds, you know you’re dealing with an exceptional musician. It means she has worked hard for years to develop skill on top of her natural talent, and we get to benefit.

It kinda makes you wonder how we let people get away with mumble rap and autotune when talent like this exists in the world.

I wish this video were longer, and I wish I had more information about this woman, but as it is, we’ll just have to appreciate the little flavor of New Orleans jazz posted by the Facebook group Clarinet Life.

Martha Ostergar is a writer who delights in the ridiculous that internet serves up, which means she's more than grateful that she gets to cruise the web for amazing videos to highlight for your viewing pleasure.
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