Welcome to the Thanksgiving edition of the Pembroke Mafia Football League and its affiliates, subsidiaries, LLCs and offshore companies.
And hey, happy Turkey Day, folks.
We hope it’s a good one for you, though if it were me and I were a turkey I’d probably head somewhere they don’t celebrate my day by throwing my frozen butt in an outdoor fryer full of boiling oil, then set the back deck on fire while they go get another cold beer.
And with that, here’s what you need to know about last week’s results and the standings to date: Dawnne Greene remains in first place.
Greene, Richmond Hill’s city clerk, has been lights out picking games this year. If we were real men we’d do something about it. Someone (Gene, Noah, Larry?) would step up and wrest the crown from her manicured grip and put it where it belongs, with a dude.
Honorable mention: Former Bryan County News Assistant Editor Ted O’Neil and Bryan County Administrator Ben Taylor are having great campaigns and if anyone can catch Dawnne, it’ll be one of them probably. Or maybe not. I haven’t looked at the standings lately.
This week’s games: Nebraska vs. Iowa: Tractor Parts Chief Mike Clark, Ol’ Bob Floyd and the Rev. Dr. Lawrence Butler pick the Corn Huskers to whop the Hawkeyes in the 200th annual “Children of the Corn” Bowl. The rest of us take Iowa, because we’re careful not to associate with giant corn people. Have you ever seen a giant ear of corn? Me neither, but they’re there, wearing dungarees and farmer hats. If they show up at your house you have to call the Nebraska DNR to come get them. Truth.
Yes, the Midwest is a weird place. And remember, Children of the Corn happened out there in Nebraska, or Iowa, or maybe
Oklahoma. Oklahoma vs. West Virginia: Everybody takes the Sooners. Georgia Southern vs. Georgia State: We all pick the Iggles, who are somehow 6-3 this season. Bring back the triple option.
Auburn vs. Alabama: Me and lifetime Auburn fan and PMFL CEO B.J.
Clark, a big shot in Pembroke American Legion Post 164, take War Beagle.
Everybody else rolls with the Tide, being the bunch of front runners they are.
Oregon vs. Oregon State: RIP Steve sir. We’re all in on the Ducks in this Civil War.
And finally, the game of the week, UGA vs. South Carolina: Yours truly is the only Gamecock picker this week (I will never pick against the Gamecocks, nor will I pick Clemson, Ohio State or UGA, college football’s unholy trinity). I am killing two rocks with one bird this week.
Everybody else takes the Dogs. Of course they do. But they’ll learn.