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Mafia forecasters taking unscheduled day off
Pembroke Mafia Football League
football play diagram
Each week, the Pembroke Mafia League tells you who is going to win upcoming college football games.

Well, butter Kirby Smart’s butt and call him a biscuit. I hope he got the tag number of that orange and blue semi with the War Eagle tag.

That said, a lengthy internet outage struck Pembroke Mafia Football League headquarters Tuesday, playing havoc with the Bryan County News production schedule. And while we do our best to put out a quality product here at the News, every second counts. In fact, and believe it or not, making a newspaper is like brain surgery or rocket science. You close your eyes and do it, and then you bill the insurance company and hope you don’t get sued.

Anyhow, though the internet has now resumed internetting, it’s put what I believe is known in some circles as the "old kibosh" on the PMFL. We’ll return in time for Thanksgiving, and we’ll all be bigger, hairier and closer to the ground, or some such thing. We’ll also be ready to start part two of the season and name the winner of part one. Hint: It’s not me.

Even better, we’ll all be wearing our eating pants and carrying our good spoons, so feel free to invite us over to your house Nov. 23. Especially if you season up a turkey with Tabasco sauce and fry it next to some beer.

Except for Noah Covington. You have to watch out for Noah. Not only is he a county commissioner and King of the North, both reason enough to keep a close watch on your wallet, he’s also known in some parts of North Bryan as Noah "Two Turkeys and a Pumpkin Pie" Covington. Heh.

PS. In an effort to bridge the gap between North and South Bryan and make everybody hold hands and stop annexing one another, we’re thinking of appointing an official team mom. We’re hoping future mayor Russ Carpenter’s mom will accept the job. But Ted O’Neil said she’ll have to bring juice boxes.

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