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Laugh: Qualifications for president changing
Argus Hamilton
Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in Hollywood and entertains groups and organizations around the country. E-mail him at - photo by File photo

HOLLYWOOD — God bless America, and how’s everybody?

Hollywood star Duane the Rock Johnson said Saturday he wants to run for president in three years. He’s taken seriously. It’s a reminder of the debt of gratitude we owe President Trump and the Democrats for taking American politics and raising it up to the level of professional wrestling.

The Washington Post said Union Station’s giant video screen was hacked in the rail passenger terminal in D.C. with straight-sex Porn Hub movies displayed to commuters. At least they didn’t show what the Post is trying to do President Trump. Not sure how you’d explain that to the little ones.

The Washington Post says Trump leaked intel on ISIS to the Russians Friday. Now Congress is on the warpath. Any guy who might get impeached over an unsubstantiated report from an unnamed source denied by everyone in the room may want to hire one of the Clinton defense lawyers.

The New York Times reported President Trump asked James Comey to drop the FBI probe of Mike Flynn in February and added that Comey heroically refused. It never ends. Trump should re-nominate Jim Comey as FBI Director just to watch the Democrats change positions on him again.

Senate Democrats flooded the cable TV news shows claiming that President Trump committed obstruction of justice Tuesday. That’s the bad news. The good news is, NBC just announced next year’s prime time line-up and Donald Trump is slated to host The Apprentice Tuesday nights at 8.

President Trump weighed the idea of canceling daily press briefings Friday due to all the press vitriol toward him. They make him look pretty bad. CNN anchors always close out their Friday broadcasts by saying Donald Trump has just had the worst week of his political career until next week.

Trump stood by confiding in Russia about ISIS plans to down airliners despite all the partisan rage. This is why nobody likes us. Build a wall too keep out foreigners and Republicans will elect you president, and save foreigners from being shot down in an airliner and Democrats will impeach you.

House Democrats planned to subpoena James Comey to testify in Congress against President Trump for trying to get him to drop the Flynn probe. In nine months the lawman has destroyed both the Democrats and Republicans. Hollywood just signed Comey to star as Conan the Presbyterian

South Carolinians and tourists lined the Charleston Harbor Monday to witness the arrival of the world’s largest-ever cargo shop. A tour bus driver told the tourists the city was named after the last member of the Royal Family ever to be executed. The tourists had no idea they were in Dianaville.

The London Telegraph reported on a clinical study of 150 drinkers which found that drinkers think their personalities change as they drink. Observers of the drinkers saw little or no change from their sober personalities. Alcohol is not the answer, but it was always my first guess.

Kim Jung Un was assessed in a CIA dossier as a man who snorts cocaine, takes Viagra, drinks cognac, dates teenage girls and enjoys the NBA. He’s ordered an ex-girlfriend executed by firing squad and had his uncle fed to the dogs. Just be yourself is the worst advice you can give some people.

North Korea’s dictator Kim Jung Un was shown gloating with his scientists on Monday after North Korea successfully tested a long-range missile for the second time. At this level, the entire world is keeping score. North Korea has officially fired more missiles than Trump has FBI Directors.

Monopoly board game makers were reportedly planning to release a New York City version of the popular game. It’s very realistic. The Jail has no spaces left, there’s no Free Parking, no one can buy a house because no one can get a mortgage, and at the end, you still have to bail out the bank

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