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Jeff Whitten: Much ado
editor's notes

There’s a reason I don’t get to make decisions.

It’s called I’m an editor.

That said, various discussions about locating a freestanding ER off that traffic quagmire at Port Royal Road and Highway 144, a plan I’m all for, has got me to pondering deep thoughts I don’t usually ponder.

Things like upscale boutiques and day spas, and our need for as many of them as we can get our hands on before Pooler gets them all, whatever they are.

And once we get them, we also need more better looking signs with fancy ornate poles that evoke thoughts of Hilton Head and Henry Ford, who I’m told used to go surfing up there before developers got hold of it and turned it into the place Ohio goes to drink beer and stare at the ocean.

While Richmond Hill is making some progress with regards to its signage thanks to the dedicated work of a number of important committees, boards, authorities and general assemblies, more signs are obviously needed. Why? Why not?

Surely, it’s important for the collective psyche that visitors sit up and take notice that here is a city of visionary thinkers that isn’t afraid to spend money to show you where you are and where you need to go, which may be either to a boutique, spa, or perhaps a restaurant or gas station to fill up before heading over to check out Pooler’s multitude of boutiques and day spas.

They must come in bundles of 50 over there.

In the meanwhile, if you run into the back of the car in front of you while you’re admiring Richmond Hill’s snappy signage, hey, no worries. You’re in good hands.

For starters, Richmond Hill has more lawyers per square inch than most cities its size, though many specialize in real estate and probably wouldn’t know a court case if it ran them over with their own Land Rover. But if you can’t find one here, just watch the Savannah TV news. You’ve got three channels and several hours worth of mayhem funded daily and almost entirely by ambulance chasers who want to help you sue the pants off somebody.

And don’t forget, the city is on its way to getting that aforementioned freestanding ER so you won’t have far to go to get stabilized before they fly you to Savannah to get more stabilized. What else?

I don’t know, my mind wanders.

While I miss the old pool halls where you could drink beer and eat chili dogs for breakfast and discuss important issues of the day, such as whether fish get thirsty or what goes on in all those upscale boutiques ands spas on Tummy Tuck Tuesdays and Wrinkle Free Wednesdays, I don’t see the old pool hall making much of a comeback in Richmond Hill anytime soon.

Cement block just isn’t upscale enough anymore.

Whitten is editor of the Bryan County News.

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