I’ve heard it said that you get what you ask for, whether you really want it or not. That’s why, the learned say, to be careful what you wish for OR ask for.
Now, I know, deep down in my heart, I know that I did NOT ask for a piece of the NASA Skylab to fall into my yard and become a big part of my life for nearly a half a year. I’ve gone over my wish list several times, and I can guarantee you, Skylab was NOT on it! Nor did I stand out in the middle of the property and utter these words to the ethers "Please bless my home with a big ol’ chunk of Skylab. I crave it so!"
However, there it was. Smack dab in the middle of my front yard.
Here is how it came to be:
Hubs came home from work late one night, and did his usual routine of playing ‘Bull in a China Shop’.
I had barely gone to bed myself so I knew that it was late.
"Hurry up!" I whispered loudly, "and be quiet about it!"
Why I had bothered whispering is beyond me, for ol’ Sunnybuns could sleep through a sonic boom. He sleeps so hard that I’ve been known to check his pulse in the middle of the night.
Anyway, Hubs finally managed to make his way to bed without completely destroying anything and after a brief chat about his day, we went to sleep.
I got up at the usual time and walked through the living room, taking time to stop and observe daybreak. I looked out the big picture window to admire our current crop of rocks and dust, and lo and behold...there it was. A big ol’ chunk of NASA in our yard.
"HUBS!" I croaked, "HUBS! Come ‘ere!"
He bolted out of bed, eyes still closed, and bounced off everything as he thudded his way to the living room.
"What!" he croaked back, stumbling up to the window, stretching one eye open.
"LOOK!" I said excitedly, "Its a piece of Skylab! How did that danged thing fall in our yard without me hearing it??"
Hubs pulled his other eye open and squinted.
"Huh? What’re you lookin’ at?" he asked, looking curiously out the window.
"Right there! Right in front of you! Look at that big honkin’ piece of Skylab!"
"OH!" he says, "That!"
I looked at him oddly and said, "Whaddya mean ‘that’?"
"That’s Aunt Gay and Uncle Gordon’s old hot tub!"
I looked back out at this huge hulking mass of whatever. It reminded me of the outline of a steamship.
"A hot tub? That’s what it is?" I couldn’t believe it.
Mr. Hardy Har Har was just laughing himself right down the hallway.
"Yeah! Uncle Gordon called me and asked if I wanted it...they just bought a new one."
Skylab was the old hot tub shell, turned upside down.
Great. One more piece of yard art to design a flower bed around. Maybe pansies would draw the eye away from it.
"Uh huh," I said, "and what are WE gonna do with it?"
I was regaled with the re-building process from A-Z.
"Stop!" I said, "Just stop. I need coffee for this...".
After he laid out the Master Plan - the full scope and spectrum of it - I said, "And this is to be completed by when?"
"Oh, two weeks! I’ll have that thing good to go in NO time!"
Summer turned to Fall...Fall into Winter. Skylab was beginning to look like one of those Easter Island figureheads to me.
When the irises began to push up through the newest crop of rocks, I told Hubs it was time to give ol’ Skylab Last Rites.
I let Hubs have a few moments alone with his prized possession, before it got tossed onto the trailer.
The neighborhood kids lined the dusty road and waved bye-bye to Magic Mountain, as they had come to know it, as Hubs and I hauled it slowly to the dump.
As it was unceremoniously tossed over the cliff down into the dump site, I smacked my hands together to dust them off. In doing so, I stepped back and thought, "Now THAT, my friends (smack!smack!!) I DID ask for!"
I check off my list...Wish Granted.