A few days ago I saw a television commercial where Bo and Luke Duke were brought back from the “Dukes of Hazzard” to promote some product. Once again they were in “The General” outrunning the law. I don’t even recall the product they were hawking, but it made me stop and think about that old programming and just how juvenile it really was — just short of “Scooby Doo.”
I never watched but a few of those shows back when they first came on. It seemed to me that this show was designed to entertain people who couldn’t figure gas mileage and thought the moon landing was faked and Bigfoot was real.
So this past week, on Channel 45, I watched bits and pieces of some old “Dukes of Hazzard” episodes. And once again, the same questions and observations popped up.
Did you ever notice that here was a show with two grown men who never had jobs. They didn’t sell cars, drive tractors or climb utility poles. They just drove around yelling, “yahoooooo!”
In every episode, they apparently were suspects in some kind of social malcontent. They were always being chased by Sheriff Roscoe P. Coltrane. So at what point do you become a habitual violator?
Then we have “Boss Hogg.” He was the lone commissioner of Hazzard County. So in what state in the union does an elected sheriff of a county answer to one commissioner?
Supposedly, this setting was in north Georgia. Oops! How did the San Rafael Mountains of Southern California get in the background? Go figure.
And apparently there were no fences in Hazzard County. The Duke boys were always running “The General” right out through the woods ... an unlikely occurrence anywhere in Georgia. The roads didn’t have ditches. You ever notice that?
I don’t recall ever seeing a paved road in any of the episodes. And apparently the county seat didn’t have a municipal police force ... kind of like Mayberry I guess.
Every episode had “The General” going airborne at some point, jumping creeks where the bridge was washed out or jumping over a chicken house. I really don’t believe that cars have suspension systems that would allow this. Nor would one find that many ramps that just happened to be in the right place to send a vehicle airborne at any given time.
And as many times as the Duke boys got arrested, they never had a lawyer. Again, go figure.
Apparently there was an exception for the Duke boys. With all the high speed chases (every episode) they never seemed to lose their driver’s licenses. So how many points did they get on their licenses and who would insure them?
But then most males watching the show had their eyes fixed on cousin Daisy Duke. She wore those patented denim shorts and a skimpy little shirt. The Duke boys could have been driving Fred Flintstone’s car and yelling “Yabba Dabba Doo” and most male viewers wouldn’t have picked up on that time warp.
But as much lawlessness as was projected in that show, no one ever got shot. The show was narrated by country singer Waylon Jennings so there were few lines for the actors to learn. Bo and Luke always wore long sleeve shirts so the few lines they had could be written right there on them. Daisy didn’t need any lines. She had curves.
Oh well, it’s all make believe. It’s entertainment.
And as lame and slapstick as it was, it still beats the heck out of the Kardashians.
You can call Walden at (912) 985-4545 or email him at firstname.lastname@example.org.