From Bryan County Sheriff’s Office reports:

Possible fraud: This is one of the oddest police incident reports we’ve ever seen. A South Bryan man called BCSO on March 22 "in reference to (original complaint: ‘strange cyber terrorist email asking for USB sticks he is sending to Russia’)," a deputy reported. "I spoke to the (complainant) who advised while he was browsing eBay shopping for a mercury battery for his camera, he found one for sale."

The man told the deputy that eBay wouldn’t ship batteries containing mercury, so he went straight to the source.

"(The complainant) contacted the seller directly. (He) advised the seller’s name was Valery Vladimirovich Ostashin who lives in Russia. (Complainant) advised he purchased the battery through his Pay Pal account and he received the battery."

The complainant then got an email from the Russian asking him "for his help on shipping twenty (20) USB drives to him in Russia. (The man) agreed to help Ostashin."

So, the complainant said he received a package with the 20 USB drives from a Brooklyn business address. The complainant repackaged the 20 USB drives and sent them to the Russian at an address in the Russian Federation.

The complainant said the Russian kept his promise and reimbursed him for the shipping fees using Pay Pal, but he then got a second package from the Russian, along with an email asking if he’d send it on to the same address as the last package, only this time the complainant was asked to address this package to a "different subject by the name of Moiseeva Lyalya Nurmehametovna, who Ostashin identified as his wife," the report said.

This is when the complainant got suspicious, so he took a look at one of the USBs, saw it "contained data" and "suspected this could be involving some type of criminal activity and contacted law enforcement."

The deputy in turn contacted the GBI, and the complainant was asked to give them to a GBI agent "at his earliest convenience." He also got a case number and was told how to get a copy of the report.

Disorderly conduct: Deputies were dispatched Monday to a scrapyard regarding an unwanted person. There, they found a man who wanted his truck keys back. His cousin said the man couldn’t have them back because he hadn’t made a payment. "And that he was terminated from his last two jobs for drug use," the woman told deputies. "(She) stated she did not want the offender to drive the truck while in his condition."

The deputies reached an agreement with the man to give him a ride home, but "(The) offender reached in the truck to grab his things, and grabbed a claw hammer smashing in the rear window of the truck. The offender stated ‘Y’all will be taking me to jail.’"

The report said the "deputies and (the man’s cousin) feared for their safety." The man was taken to jail.

House fire: From a March 21 report comes this tale of a man who probably shouldn’t be grilling without a hose nearby. A deputy was sent to a Round Stone Way address because of a fire on the back patio. "Upon my arrival the Bryan County Fire Department had the fire extinguished," wrote the deputy. "The awning suffered minor damage and the vinyl siding was melted. The home owner … stated he was lighting his grill to cook dinner when the flames caught the ceiling of the patio on fire. He then pulled the grill into the backyard where it fell over."

The fire department pulled ceiling panels to make sure the fire was out. No one was hurt. The homeowner was given a case number and told to call BCSO if "they began to smell smoke again."

Criminal trespass: A deputy was sent March 21 to a Summer Hill Way address regarding a real estate agent’s complaint of criminal trespass. The complainant told the deputy that someone "has repeatedly parked their car, and sometimes a truck, in the residence’s driveway without their permission."

The deputy saw a car in the driveway and tracked down the owner, who lived just up the street. "(She) stated that she and her boyfriend … have been using the driveway … because both of their vehicles do not fit in their own driveway. (She) was instructed to move her vehicle and informed that their vehicles were not authorized to park in (the other driveway)."

Mail theft: A Pembroke man reported March 20 that someone went into his mailbox and stole "a check written to him by the Fulton County Magistrate’s office," a report said. The man said the check, which was for $5,395, was made out to him and "he did not believe whoever took the check could cash it and that he had already contacted the Fulton County magistrate to stop payment on the check."

Still, the man needed a report. And, "the complainant also advised that whoever took the check had left the envelope in which the check was mailed and had torn the envelope into several small pieces."

Burglary: A Pembroke woman told deputies March 21 that someone "entered her mobile home, and stole an antique mahogany dining room table, and six matching stairs."

The woman said the table was heavy and it would have "taken several people to move it," the report said. The woman also said she doesn’t live at the trailer but checks on it every week or so. She said the table was there March 16.

The report said there were no signs the place had been broken into, but she found the front door open. The woman said the table was more than 100 years old, but she wasn’t sure how much it was worth.

Matter of record: A deputy was dispatched around 6 p.m. March 22 to mile marker 83 on I-95 south to look into an anonymous complaint regarding a kid who’d been kicked and then ran into the woods, or ran into the woods and then was kicked.

The deputy spoke with the mother of the kid, who ran off. She said her "juvenile daughter and juvenile son were arguing in the back seats. (The mother) stated she pulled over to separate the two (2) juveniles and as she got them out of the vehicle they continued fighting. (The mother) stated once she was able to separate them the daughter ran into the woods."

While the deputy was there, "the female juvenile approached slowly and spoke to me. The juvenile stated she was scared her mother was going to spank her for fighting her younger brother. Both juveniles were secured back in the vehicle."

Unknown vehicle: A Pembroke woman called deputies March 21 "in reference to headlights that often go part way up her driveway," a report said.

"Upon the deputies’ arrival, the complainant stated that a vehicle every night comes part way up her driveway and then backs out. 119 Storage is located in front of the complainant’s house. Deputies advised the complainant that the storage units are part of the patrol zone and the spot light from the deputies’ vehicle may be what she is seeing. The deputies advised the complainant that if an unwanted vehicle does come all the way up her driveway to call back."