The below incidents are taken from Bryan County Sheriff’s Department reports.

Shoplifting
On June 10, a deputy was sent to a location on Highway 80 in north Bryan regarding shoplifting at a store, the name of which was blacked out by the sheriff’s department.
The deputy got a description of the alleged offender, a photo of the back of the guy and talked to someone who spotted the man allegedly take “two packs of ribeye steaks and place them down his pants and then cover them with his shirt,” the report said. “Whenever this subject went to walk out the door … (an employee) approached this subject. At this time the subject took the steaks out of his pant and threw them on the counter, then ran across Hwy. 80 behind Parkers.”
The guy wasn’t caught. Also worth noting: the report said the two packs of steaks were $44.13.

Theft
From the “if it isn’t nailed down, there's a good chance someone might steal it” file:
A report of a June 9 theft from an Ellabell construction site went this way: “(Complainant) stated that the previous day, they set up the lights on the light tower to light up the construction site and he noticed that two lights were missing from it,” a deputy reported. “It is supposed to have four and it only had two. Myself and (complainant) walked through the area to see if we could locate the lights thinking they may have been used on another light tower. We were unable to locate the light fixtures.”

Scam
A deputy was dispatched June 13 — otherwise known this month as Friday — to deal what the report said was a possible phone scam. Not to mention one sharp intended target and one dumb scammer, it appears.
The complainant told the deputy she got a call around 4 p.m. from a caller who said he was with the IRS and gave her a badge number.
“(Complainant) stated that the … subject advised her that she had an outstanding federal tax debt through the State of Georgia of $1,200 … and she needed to pay him over the phone or an arrest warrant would be issues by the close of business today,” the report said.
The intended victim told the deputy she was suspicious of the caller “due to (his) advising her that he was a federal agent collecting tax funds for the state of Georgia.”
What’s more, “(complainant) stated she requested more information and had trouble understanding the caller’s foreign accent.”
So, she hung up and conducted a reverse lookup of the caller’s number, which tracked back to the Bronx in New York and, what’s more, the “number appeared to have been reported as being used in a tax scam,” she told the deputy, while also noting she didn’t give the man any of her personal information.
The woman didn’t want to prosecute, just wanted the incident recorded.

Disabled vehicle
Someone could maybe write a country song about this one.
Around 9 a.m. June 15 a deputy was sent to a South Bryan road regarding a pickup abandoned by a woman in the middle of the road.
“Upon my arrival I located the vehicle … in the roadway causing a road hazard with its hazard lights on,” the deputy reported. “(A firefighter who saw the incident) stated he observed the vehicle stop in the middle of the roadway with what appeared to be mechanical issues.”
Then, “(the firefighter) observed a female subject exit the vehicle and walk toward the Old Mill Road area.”
The firefighter directed traffic around the pickup while the deputy found the woman walking down the road.
“(The woman) stated she borrowed the vehicle to remove some of her personal items from her boyfriend’s residence … (she) stated after departing the vehicle broke down on Belfast Estates Road and she was unable to restart the vehicle.”
The deputy got a tow truck.