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Workplace bullying is still a problem, survey shows
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I had hoped that increasing awareness of the problem of workplace bullying would lead to a decrease in its occurrence. A new survey, however, makes me believe that has not happened. - photo by Greg Kratz
The average workday can be tough to navigate for your basic resident of Cubeville.

You've got to push through seemingly endless meetings, only some of which appear to have a point. You have to deal with office politics, which can change so rapidly that it makes your head spin. And while you hopefully have time to do meaningful work each day, you'll also spend time on mundane tasks such as reconciling expense reports.

While some of these daily challenges are definitely not fun, they're usually manageable, and they're an expected part of an office job.

What is less manageable, and should never have a place in any work environment, is bullying. And yet it continues to be a problem.

I've written about bullying at work before, and my columns on that topic garnered some of the most passionate responses from readers that I've received.

I had hoped that increasing awareness of the problem of workplace bullying would lead to a decrease in its occurrence. A new survey, however, makes me believe that has not happened.

The survey by OfficeTeam, a Robert Half company that specializes in the temporary placement of office and administrative support professionals, found that 35 percent of respondents said they have worked at a company in which they had to deal with an office bully.

For the survey, OfficeTeam received responses from more than 300 U.S. adults who were employed in office environments and more than 300 human resources managers at companies with 20 or more employees.

That's a decent sample size, but I'm guessing that the result showing about a third of people have dealt with office bullies may still be a bit low. Think about your work history for a minute. Can you recall an office you worked in that didn't include at least one person who exhibited bullying behavior?

I'm guessing that not everyone agrees on what constitutes bullying, and it's probably true that there are some shades of gray in the definition. However, some forms of bullying are obvious. And the fact remains that just as it's not hard to find a bully on almost any school playground, it's also fairly easy to identify one in almost any office.

The OfficeTeam survey again backs this up, to some extent. When human resources managers were asked how often bullying took place at their companies, 6 percent said very often, and 21 percent said somewhat often. Another 35 percent said not very often, while 38 percent said bullying never occurred at their companies.

If you take the top three categories, 62 percent of HR managers believe that bullying occurs at least occasionally in their offices. That's definitely a sobering statistic.

The OfficeTeam survey also asked workers who had dealt with an office bully what they had done in response. Thirty-two percent said they mustered up their courage and confronted the bully, while 27 percent said they told their manager. I applaud both groups for taking action.

I feel worse for the 13 percent of respondents who said they quit their job and the 17 percent who said they did nothing. These are people who likely didn't think they had the personal or professional tools to deal with the bully, so they either made a major life change or suffered in silence. Or perhaps the bully was a supervisor, and the employee felt he or she had no recourse but to shut up and take the abuse.

Either situation is unfortunate at best and tragic at worst. And the problem seems to be all too easy for some companies to ignore.

Workplace bullying often flies under the radar because employees tolerate or fail to report it, said Robert Hosking, executive director of OfficeTeam, in a press release about the survey. Managers and staff alike should be supported in addressing bullying issues. This includes not giving anyone a pass for negative behavior, no matter how valued that person may be.

Along those lines, OfficeTeam offered five tips to help people who are the victims of workplace bullying, including:

  • Take a stand. OfficeTeam's press release suggests that you should avoid being an easy target, as bullies often back off if you stick up for yourself. I think that's true, but I also know that following through on this advice could be difficult for many people.
  • Talk it out. "Have a one-on-one discussion with the bully, providing examples of behaviors that made you feel uncomfortable," the OfficeTeam release said. "It's possible the person is unaware of how his or her actions are negatively affecting others."
  • Keep your cool. Stay calm and professional, and don't stoop to the bully's level. This is vital, I think, as you don't want to combat bullying by becoming a bully yourself.
  • Document poor conduct. OfficeTeam recommends that you keep a record of instances of workplace bullying, detailing what was said or done in each case. I've found that documentation is important in pretty much any workplace dispute, and I always encourage people to keep thorough notes about conflicts.
  • Seek support. "If the issue is serious or you arent able to resolve it on your own, alert your manager or HR department for assistance," the OfficeTeam release said. That's what HR is for, and I think this is definitely a route to consider.
Regardless of how workers deal with bullying, I hope they are able to find ways to overcome this problem.

And again, I'd appreciate your input on this topic. Do you think bullying in the office is more or less prevalent now than it was a few years ago? Why? Have you faced bullying at work? How did you try to deal with it? What worked or didn't work?

Please send me your responses in an email or through an online comment, and I'll use some of them in a future column.
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How to avoid 'sharenting' and other paparazzi parenting habits
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A recent study revealed parents often spend up to two hours staging a single photo of his or her child to post online. - photo by Amy Iverson
Before having kids, some people just dont appreciate their friends baby posts. But after having a child of their own, three fourths of new parents jump right on the parental social media bandwagon. If you have become a member of this group, there are some rules to follow for posting responsibly.

Much of a parents worry is how to teach their children to use social media responsibly. We talk with our kids about privacy, oversharing, and setting restrictions on their devices to keep them safe. But parents themselves need to look in the digital mirror once in a while. Before having children, it doesnt take as much effort to think about what to post online. Its up to us to decide what we share about our own lives. But once you become a parent, there are many questions to think about regarding what is appropriate to post about your kids on social media.

In a recent survey, kids clothing subscription company Mac and Mia surveyed 2000 new parents to find out how they are documenting their kids lives on social media, and what concerns they may have.

First of all, people without children seem to feel a bit differently about the onslaught of baby pictures online than those who are parents. 18 percent of people say before they had kids, they were annoyed by their friends baby posts. But after having children of their own, 73 percent admit they post progress pictures of their little ones every single month.

Not only are new parents letting the world know each time their baby is a month older, but they are posting about their kids every few days or so. Men and women report they post 6-7 times per month about their baby.

And while 70 percent of new parents say the benefit of using social media is how easy it is to help family and friends feel involved, there are some downsides. Here are a few tips to avoid the pitfall of becoming paparazzi parents.

Dont miss the moment

In the Mac and Mia survey, some parents admitted to spending up to two hours to get the perfect shot of their baby. That seems a little extreme. New and old parents alike should be careful about spending so much time taking pictures and videos that they dont enjoy the moment. Years ago, I decided to never live an experience through my phone. A study by Linda Henkel, a psychology professor at Fairfield University in Connecticut, found that when people took pictures of objects in an art museum, they didnt remember the objects as well as if they simply observed them.

This photo-taking impairment effect can happen to parents as well. If we are so consumed by getting the perfect photo, we can miss out on the moment all together, and our memory of it will suffer.

Dont forget about privacy

60 percent of couples say they have discussed rules and boundaries for posting their babys photos, according to the Mac and Mia survey. Even so, men are 34 percent more likely to publish baby posts on public accounts. If parents are concerned about their childrens privacy, keeping photos off of public accounts is a given.

In the Washington Post, Stacey Steinberg, a legal skills professor at the University of Florida, and Bahareh Keith, a Portland pediatrician, wrote that sharing too much information about kids online puts them at risk. They write that all that sharenting can make it easier for data thieves to target out kids for identity theft. Check that your privacy settings are where they should be and never share identifying information like full names and birth dates.

Dont be paparazzi parents

36 percent of parents say they take issue when their childs photo is posted online by someone else. Responsible social media users will always ask permission before posting a photo of another child. But parents should also think about whether their own children will take issue with their own posted photos a few years down the road.

When parents are constantly snapping pictures and throwing them on social media, it can be easy to forget to pause and make sure the post is appropriate. I always use the billboard example with my kids. I ask them to picture whatever they are posting going up on a billboard in our neighborhood. If they are okay with that, then their post is probably fine. Parents should ask themselves this same question when posting about their children. But they should also ask themselves if their child would be OK with this post on a billboard in 15 years. If it would cause embarrassment or humiliation, it might be best to keep it private.

Once children reach an appropriate age, parents should include them in the process of deciding what pictures are OK to post. Researchers at the University of Michigan surveyed 10- to 17-year-olds and found children believe their parents should ask permission more than parents think they should. The kids in the survey said sharing happy family moments, or accomplishments in sports, school and hobbies is fine. But when the post is negative (like when a child is disciplined) or embarrassing (think naked baby pictures or messy hair), kids say to keep it off social media.
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