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Why I'm not cheering the end of summer
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The glory of summer days is that we slow down and spend our time together. - photo by Erin Stewart
Summer is winding to an end, and school is right around the corner. The evidence is everywhere as bubbles and barbecue aisles give way to Halloween decorations because its August, and clearly that's the ideal time to begin binge-buying pumpkin dcor. But thats a rant for another time.

This rant is about the end of summer. It happens every year, even though it seems like long, lazy summer days will never end when Im looking from the end-of-school parties in May. The summer stretches out in front of me like a happy reward for all my months of being an adult. I volunteer in the classroom, make lunches and do grown-up things like parent-teacher conferences all year long.

So when summer comes, I play. And when summer starts to end, I always feel like its too soon.

Sure, there are some pluses to the start of school, such as not having to arbitrate one more ridiculous fight among my children or reminding them that their new little brother cant breathe in hugs that tight. After three months of family bonding and sibling rivalry, a school day does seem like a welcome reprieve.

So while I understand the feeling of excitement for a little more routine and little less togetherness, like in this hilarious video from the Holderness family, I dont quite share the excitement that the summer is nearly over.

Instead, Im looking at the calendar and having a mild panic attack. Did we do everything on our summer bucket list? Did we really squeeze out every ounce of summer fun before we head back to the races? Back to cleaning out lunch boxes with questionable food remains because theyve been left in the car for a week. Back to waking up early and hurrying out the door. Back to taking deep breaths in the kiss-and-ride line as other mothers forget basic driving skills.

Theres no escaping it: Going back to school means saying goodbye to summer days. Goodbye to spontaneous stops at the snow cone stand. Goodbye to long afternoons at the pool. Goodbye to being in charge of our day because there are no meetings, no practices, no bells.

Because in the summer, there's just time together.

Perhaps thats why summer days are so glorious time seems to stand still. For three months, I reclaim my children.

And when that opening bell rings on the first day of school, it shatters my time-free bubble. The school year ushers in a new grade, new milestones and a new reminder that my childrens childhoods are racing by.

Starting on that first day of school, I have to give my children back to time with its relentless, unforgiving pace. It sweeps us up in its all-encompassing forward motion, barely letting us take a breath until Christmas. We are, once again, at the mercy of the clock, rushing to be on time, make the most of our time and finish on time. Time rules our schedules, and our schedules rule us.

So yes, I am excited for some quiet around here, but I know when the hush does settle on my house, I will long for those infinite summer days when all time demanded of us was to spend it together.
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How to avoid 'sharenting' and other paparazzi parenting habits
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A recent study revealed parents often spend up to two hours staging a single photo of his or her child to post online. - photo by Amy Iverson
Before having kids, some people just dont appreciate their friends baby posts. But after having a child of their own, three fourths of new parents jump right on the parental social media bandwagon. If you have become a member of this group, there are some rules to follow for posting responsibly.

Much of a parents worry is how to teach their children to use social media responsibly. We talk with our kids about privacy, oversharing, and setting restrictions on their devices to keep them safe. But parents themselves need to look in the digital mirror once in a while. Before having children, it doesnt take as much effort to think about what to post online. Its up to us to decide what we share about our own lives. But once you become a parent, there are many questions to think about regarding what is appropriate to post about your kids on social media.

In a recent survey, kids clothing subscription company Mac and Mia surveyed 2000 new parents to find out how they are documenting their kids lives on social media, and what concerns they may have.

First of all, people without children seem to feel a bit differently about the onslaught of baby pictures online than those who are parents. 18 percent of people say before they had kids, they were annoyed by their friends baby posts. But after having children of their own, 73 percent admit they post progress pictures of their little ones every single month.

Not only are new parents letting the world know each time their baby is a month older, but they are posting about their kids every few days or so. Men and women report they post 6-7 times per month about their baby.

And while 70 percent of new parents say the benefit of using social media is how easy it is to help family and friends feel involved, there are some downsides. Here are a few tips to avoid the pitfall of becoming paparazzi parents.

Dont miss the moment

In the Mac and Mia survey, some parents admitted to spending up to two hours to get the perfect shot of their baby. That seems a little extreme. New and old parents alike should be careful about spending so much time taking pictures and videos that they dont enjoy the moment. Years ago, I decided to never live an experience through my phone. A study by Linda Henkel, a psychology professor at Fairfield University in Connecticut, found that when people took pictures of objects in an art museum, they didnt remember the objects as well as if they simply observed them.

This photo-taking impairment effect can happen to parents as well. If we are so consumed by getting the perfect photo, we can miss out on the moment all together, and our memory of it will suffer.

Dont forget about privacy

60 percent of couples say they have discussed rules and boundaries for posting their babys photos, according to the Mac and Mia survey. Even so, men are 34 percent more likely to publish baby posts on public accounts. If parents are concerned about their childrens privacy, keeping photos off of public accounts is a given.

In the Washington Post, Stacey Steinberg, a legal skills professor at the University of Florida, and Bahareh Keith, a Portland pediatrician, wrote that sharing too much information about kids online puts them at risk. They write that all that sharenting can make it easier for data thieves to target out kids for identity theft. Check that your privacy settings are where they should be and never share identifying information like full names and birth dates.

Dont be paparazzi parents

36 percent of parents say they take issue when their childs photo is posted online by someone else. Responsible social media users will always ask permission before posting a photo of another child. But parents should also think about whether their own children will take issue with their own posted photos a few years down the road.

When parents are constantly snapping pictures and throwing them on social media, it can be easy to forget to pause and make sure the post is appropriate. I always use the billboard example with my kids. I ask them to picture whatever they are posting going up on a billboard in our neighborhood. If they are okay with that, then their post is probably fine. Parents should ask themselves this same question when posting about their children. But they should also ask themselves if their child would be OK with this post on a billboard in 15 years. If it would cause embarrassment or humiliation, it might be best to keep it private.

Once children reach an appropriate age, parents should include them in the process of deciding what pictures are OK to post. Researchers at the University of Michigan surveyed 10- to 17-year-olds and found children believe their parents should ask permission more than parents think they should. The kids in the survey said sharing happy family moments, or accomplishments in sports, school and hobbies is fine. But when the post is negative (like when a child is disciplined) or embarrassing (think naked baby pictures or messy hair), kids say to keep it off social media.
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