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What we can learn from an NFL that looks down on swearing
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No Caption - photo by Herb Scribner
Seattle Seahawks coach Pete Carroll wants to take the F-words and bad manners out of football.

Ken Belson of The New York Times wrote this weekend about how Carroll has led the former Super Bowl champions with a new philosophy predicated on New Age spirituality where players are encouraged to be mindful of their surroundings, teammates and opponents.

All-Star tight end Jimmy Graham was taken back by Carrolls approach when he joined the Seahawks this summer, Belson wrote.

Football has an old-school mentality: Were going to grind you into the ground, were going to make men out of boys, and when you do something bad, were going to demean you, Graham told The Times. But here, they feel like you guys are already men and were going to treat you like men. Its literally all positive reinforcement.

Instead of encouraging players to do better through cusses, swears and insults, the teams staff remains supportive and nurturing towards its players, the Times reported.

The Seahawks who dropped last years Super Bowl in the closing minutes, falling to the New England Patriots, 28-24 hope to return to the championship game using this philosophy, Benson wrote.

We have a philosophy and we believe in it, and because circumstances and issues arise, winning championships and maybe not winning championships, that doesnt affect what we believe in and work for, Carroll told The Times. Hopefully the philosophy helps guide you through those times.

Carrolls strategy comes at a time when profanity is almost commonplace in the United States. Its become so common, in fact, that young people will drop F-bombs and cuss words even in formal settings or among respected peers and elders, like their professors, our own Mark Kellner reported in 2014.

"Profanity is something that has become so widespread in its acceptance that it doesn't carry the weight that it did 20 or 30 years ago," Wendy Patrick, a prosecutor and professor, told Kellner.

People also swear often at work, on the campaign trail and in the movies. In fact, as our Chandra Johnson wrote earlier this year, profanity has increased among films and TV shows with the rise of streaming networks like Netflix, where FCC guidelines dont apply, Johnson reported.

Profanity has gained even more popularity when you consider its traditional meaning, Johnson reported. Experts often remind people that the true meaning of profanity revolves around using Gods name in vein. So when you factor in how often TV and movie character utter his name, profanity's reach has increased exponentially, Johnson wrote.

Swear words have increased in the media because theyve become the equivalent of breathing a sigh of relief, Swedens Sdertrn University professor Kristy Beers Fgersten told Johnson. Theyre used to show emotion on screen, which people take and use in their daily lives, she said.

But not all those who hear cusses are prone to use them. Some, especially believers who follow the third commandment, will use alternate words to avoid profanity, Johnson wrote.

Theres a long history of euphemistic expressions invented for reasons of avoiding explicitly saying Gods name. We have gosh, for example, Beers Fgersten told Johnson. Swear words have religious roots, and there are alternative words we use to avoid saying religious words.

Using alternate words is just one tip parents can offer their child to avoid swearing. For parents, talking to a child about swearing can be difficult, especially when a child feels pressure from friends to start using cuss words or to embrace taboo behavior, according to Common Sense Media.

Parents may want to expand their own vocabulary so they can offer their child alternative words to cussing, and it may also be good practice for parents to limit their childs exposure to TV shows and movies with profanity, according to Common Sense Media.

But dont go throwing out your copy of Friends just yet. Common Sense Media suggest parents use TV shows and films with cuss words to show poor examples of word use, allowing them to teach lessons to children about alternative routes those characters could have taken.

Point out when TV characters call each other names, and ask kids how they could have handled the situation differently, Common Sense media reported.
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How to avoid 'sharenting' and other paparazzi parenting habits
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A recent study revealed parents often spend up to two hours staging a single photo of his or her child to post online. - photo by Amy Iverson
Before having kids, some people just dont appreciate their friends baby posts. But after having a child of their own, three fourths of new parents jump right on the parental social media bandwagon. If you have become a member of this group, there are some rules to follow for posting responsibly.

Much of a parents worry is how to teach their children to use social media responsibly. We talk with our kids about privacy, oversharing, and setting restrictions on their devices to keep them safe. But parents themselves need to look in the digital mirror once in a while. Before having children, it doesnt take as much effort to think about what to post online. Its up to us to decide what we share about our own lives. But once you become a parent, there are many questions to think about regarding what is appropriate to post about your kids on social media.

In a recent survey, kids clothing subscription company Mac and Mia surveyed 2000 new parents to find out how they are documenting their kids lives on social media, and what concerns they may have.

First of all, people without children seem to feel a bit differently about the onslaught of baby pictures online than those who are parents. 18 percent of people say before they had kids, they were annoyed by their friends baby posts. But after having children of their own, 73 percent admit they post progress pictures of their little ones every single month.

Not only are new parents letting the world know each time their baby is a month older, but they are posting about their kids every few days or so. Men and women report they post 6-7 times per month about their baby.

And while 70 percent of new parents say the benefit of using social media is how easy it is to help family and friends feel involved, there are some downsides. Here are a few tips to avoid the pitfall of becoming paparazzi parents.

Dont miss the moment

In the Mac and Mia survey, some parents admitted to spending up to two hours to get the perfect shot of their baby. That seems a little extreme. New and old parents alike should be careful about spending so much time taking pictures and videos that they dont enjoy the moment. Years ago, I decided to never live an experience through my phone. A study by Linda Henkel, a psychology professor at Fairfield University in Connecticut, found that when people took pictures of objects in an art museum, they didnt remember the objects as well as if they simply observed them.

This photo-taking impairment effect can happen to parents as well. If we are so consumed by getting the perfect photo, we can miss out on the moment all together, and our memory of it will suffer.

Dont forget about privacy

60 percent of couples say they have discussed rules and boundaries for posting their babys photos, according to the Mac and Mia survey. Even so, men are 34 percent more likely to publish baby posts on public accounts. If parents are concerned about their childrens privacy, keeping photos off of public accounts is a given.

In the Washington Post, Stacey Steinberg, a legal skills professor at the University of Florida, and Bahareh Keith, a Portland pediatrician, wrote that sharing too much information about kids online puts them at risk. They write that all that sharenting can make it easier for data thieves to target out kids for identity theft. Check that your privacy settings are where they should be and never share identifying information like full names and birth dates.

Dont be paparazzi parents

36 percent of parents say they take issue when their childs photo is posted online by someone else. Responsible social media users will always ask permission before posting a photo of another child. But parents should also think about whether their own children will take issue with their own posted photos a few years down the road.

When parents are constantly snapping pictures and throwing them on social media, it can be easy to forget to pause and make sure the post is appropriate. I always use the billboard example with my kids. I ask them to picture whatever they are posting going up on a billboard in our neighborhood. If they are okay with that, then their post is probably fine. Parents should ask themselves this same question when posting about their children. But they should also ask themselves if their child would be OK with this post on a billboard in 15 years. If it would cause embarrassment or humiliation, it might be best to keep it private.

Once children reach an appropriate age, parents should include them in the process of deciding what pictures are OK to post. Researchers at the University of Michigan surveyed 10- to 17-year-olds and found children believe their parents should ask permission more than parents think they should. The kids in the survey said sharing happy family moments, or accomplishments in sports, school and hobbies is fine. But when the post is negative (like when a child is disciplined) or embarrassing (think naked baby pictures or messy hair), kids say to keep it off social media.
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