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The agony and ecstasy of traveling with small children
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Erin Stewart's girls with a whole lot of stuff they probably don't need to take on their trip. - photo by Erin Stewart
Traveling with kids is one of those things thats way better in theory. Like going to the beach with infants two cups of digested sand later, you wonder who thought this was a good idea.

So as I packed up my family this year to go on our first big vacation with our newest addition (our now almost 1-year-old son), all the craziness of trying to pack and travel with a baby came flooding back to me.

First, theres the packing. Oh, the packing. How can such a small little human need so much stuff? And of course, I have to pack as if we will be miles away from civilization where no one has heard of diapers or baby food. We were, after all, headed to the exotically remote destination of Orlando. (Thats right, were taking a 1-year-old to a theme park, so you know youll be hearing about that experience soon, assuming, of course, I live to tell the tale.)

But I digress. Back to the packing. As I loaded up every bottle, spoon, diaper, piece of clothing and toy the baby could possibly need for a weeklong excursion, I decided to focus on the good aspects of traveling with children.

Heres what Ive got:

1. If I never went on trips, my toilets would never get cleaned. Its no secret that Im not the best housekeeper, so things like toilets, sinks and that weird spot behind the trash can where half-eaten strawberries always migrate never get cleaned. Ever. But before a trip, I clean. Why? Well, because the only thing more terrifying than some horrible catastrophe befalling us while on vacation is the thought of someone then going into my house and finding five-years worth of squished strawberries and hard-water rings.

2. If I never went on trips, my kids would never have matching socks. Sometimes it takes a good pre-trip packing session to make me realize all the things I am behind on doing like pairing socks, folding laundry and making sure my kids' shoes still fit. I was amazed this time to find my kids had outgrown all their summer shoes, hats and bathing suits, and that they have been pulling mismatched socks out of the to-do bin for months.

3. If I never went on trips, I wouldnt unplug. My husband and I made the bold decision on this trip to not take our computers. When I asked him what we would do in the evenings when the kids are in bed, he replied, I dont know. Maybe spend time together? Revolutionary stuff here, folks. But the sad truth is, if we have our computers, we will work. We will find something we have to do rather than just seek each others company.

And really, thats what any trip with my family should be about. Its the time spent together that makes any trips with small children worth it. No, they wont remember most of it. They will never have any idea the amount of time that went into my Tetris-worthy packing job or the planning that went into coordinating a fun-filled week away.

I hope, deep down, they remember the feeling of being on an adventure together. The packing will end. The sand will pass. And hopefully what will be left is the memory of choosing to spend a few days together, seeking each others company and getting to know these little humans a little bit better.
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How to avoid 'sharenting' and other paparazzi parenting habits
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A recent study revealed parents often spend up to two hours staging a single photo of his or her child to post online. - photo by Amy Iverson
Before having kids, some people just dont appreciate their friends baby posts. But after having a child of their own, three fourths of new parents jump right on the parental social media bandwagon. If you have become a member of this group, there are some rules to follow for posting responsibly.

Much of a parents worry is how to teach their children to use social media responsibly. We talk with our kids about privacy, oversharing, and setting restrictions on their devices to keep them safe. But parents themselves need to look in the digital mirror once in a while. Before having children, it doesnt take as much effort to think about what to post online. Its up to us to decide what we share about our own lives. But once you become a parent, there are many questions to think about regarding what is appropriate to post about your kids on social media.

In a recent survey, kids clothing subscription company Mac and Mia surveyed 2000 new parents to find out how they are documenting their kids lives on social media, and what concerns they may have.

First of all, people without children seem to feel a bit differently about the onslaught of baby pictures online than those who are parents. 18 percent of people say before they had kids, they were annoyed by their friends baby posts. But after having children of their own, 73 percent admit they post progress pictures of their little ones every single month.

Not only are new parents letting the world know each time their baby is a month older, but they are posting about their kids every few days or so. Men and women report they post 6-7 times per month about their baby.

And while 70 percent of new parents say the benefit of using social media is how easy it is to help family and friends feel involved, there are some downsides. Here are a few tips to avoid the pitfall of becoming paparazzi parents.

Dont miss the moment

In the Mac and Mia survey, some parents admitted to spending up to two hours to get the perfect shot of their baby. That seems a little extreme. New and old parents alike should be careful about spending so much time taking pictures and videos that they dont enjoy the moment. Years ago, I decided to never live an experience through my phone. A study by Linda Henkel, a psychology professor at Fairfield University in Connecticut, found that when people took pictures of objects in an art museum, they didnt remember the objects as well as if they simply observed them.

This photo-taking impairment effect can happen to parents as well. If we are so consumed by getting the perfect photo, we can miss out on the moment all together, and our memory of it will suffer.

Dont forget about privacy

60 percent of couples say they have discussed rules and boundaries for posting their babys photos, according to the Mac and Mia survey. Even so, men are 34 percent more likely to publish baby posts on public accounts. If parents are concerned about their childrens privacy, keeping photos off of public accounts is a given.

In the Washington Post, Stacey Steinberg, a legal skills professor at the University of Florida, and Bahareh Keith, a Portland pediatrician, wrote that sharing too much information about kids online puts them at risk. They write that all that sharenting can make it easier for data thieves to target out kids for identity theft. Check that your privacy settings are where they should be and never share identifying information like full names and birth dates.

Dont be paparazzi parents

36 percent of parents say they take issue when their childs photo is posted online by someone else. Responsible social media users will always ask permission before posting a photo of another child. But parents should also think about whether their own children will take issue with their own posted photos a few years down the road.

When parents are constantly snapping pictures and throwing them on social media, it can be easy to forget to pause and make sure the post is appropriate. I always use the billboard example with my kids. I ask them to picture whatever they are posting going up on a billboard in our neighborhood. If they are okay with that, then their post is probably fine. Parents should ask themselves this same question when posting about their children. But they should also ask themselves if their child would be OK with this post on a billboard in 15 years. If it would cause embarrassment or humiliation, it might be best to keep it private.

Once children reach an appropriate age, parents should include them in the process of deciding what pictures are OK to post. Researchers at the University of Michigan surveyed 10- to 17-year-olds and found children believe their parents should ask permission more than parents think they should. The kids in the survey said sharing happy family moments, or accomplishments in sports, school and hobbies is fine. But when the post is negative (like when a child is disciplined) or embarrassing (think naked baby pictures or messy hair), kids say to keep it off social media.
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