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So you want to help refugees here's how
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Volunteers and refugees sort through book donations shipped to the Kyllini refugee camp in western Greece in July 2016. - photo by Hayley A. Smith
We didnt exactly plan for our refugee donation drop-off event to take place on the hottest day of the year 118 degrees F would scare most people into staying home directly under the air conditioning vent.

But wed planned the Lifting Hands International event for weeks and couldnt cancel it two days before, so we announced that it was still happening and crossed our fingers that some people would come drop off donations at our Phoenix warehouse. LHI is a nonprofit organization I started in January 2016 that provides humanitarian relief for refugees abroad, as well as those getting resettled in the Phoenix area, and donations are a big part of what we do.

People showed up all day. In fact, our warehouse ran out of room, and we had to borrow a moving truck and storage space to fit everything in.

I learned that people want to help. But its not always easy to know how. Donating items to an organization is just one of several ways to help refugees, both at home and abroad.

When deciding the best way to help, there are several things to consider. The first thing to do is get informed in detail about the reasons refugees are fleeing their homes. Then look into ways to volunteer your talents in your local community or donate to grass-roots groups that are on the ground. Some people also choose to volunteer abroad.

1. Get informed

We all know that refugees are fleeing their homes due to persecution, war or natural disasters, but that isnt always enough to truly understand their plight. Every refugees story is unique and personal and is molded by the particular struggle theyve escaped.

The knowledge you gain will transform into empathy and understanding. It will also help you wade through the sands of often conflicting political arguments, media reports and public opinion that isnt always accurate.

Read about the current crisis:

Documentaries:

2. Help locally

Statistically speaking, refugees who get resettled in the USA have found the ultimate pot of gold. Out of 65 million refugees in the world, only 1 percent of them will get resettled. Half of that 1 percent will resettle in the United States. Local resettlement agencies can get overwhelmed with an increasing number of incoming refugee families and limited budgets.

There are many volunteer roles with local organizations, such as teaching English, mentoring families, translating, making welcome kits, preparing international shipments, and others.

In Phoenix, for example, LHI reached out to local agencies and learned their caseworkers were getting bogged down with gathering federally mandated furniture for homes. Agencies are required to provide a minimal amount of furniture; however, any furniture comes out of the familys limited stipend, which is barely enough to cover rent. Many families end up with just a couch and a few mattresses in order to save money.

Our teams now collect all sorts of household items from a list in advance, so that once an agency gives us a referral, we can mobilize and furnish the apartment a few days before the family arrives. It helps refugees feel more at home and saves them money for rent. It also frees up time for caseworkers to actually do their jobs.

Furnishing apartments is not for everyone. To find ways to use your particular talents, check JustServe.org for service opportunities or reach out to the local arms of the following agencies that resettle refugees in the USA. Keep in mind that local branches of these agencies often have different names from the main organization. Not all agencies have offices in your city. For example, Phoenix only has four. Salt Lake has two.

3. Donate

Donating goods is good. Donating cash is often better. Cash donations can be used to purchase supplies on the ground in countries where refugees live, contributing to the local economy and ensuring that people get exactly what they need.

There are dozens of grass-roots organizations on the ground that provide basic necessities to refugees directly and hands-on. For example, LHI uses donated money to purchase vegetables, cooking oil, rice, lentils, tea, sugar, flour, dish detergent, laundry powder, shampoo, soap, diapers and many other basic items for the 525+ refugees in our camp.

Some organizations doing good work on the ground that could benefit from donations include:

4. Volunteer abroad

Volunteering is an expensive and difficult job. Unless you are absolutely determined to see the situation for yourself or you have highly desired skills, it may be better to donate the cost of your trip to a grass-roots nonprofit that will put the money to use directly and swiftly.

People with highly desired skills include trauma specialists, translators and medical personnel. Most organizations require a minimum time commitment of two weeks.

A good way to find organizations you can volunteer for is through Facebook pages, such as the Information Point for Greece Volunteers. Representatives of several nonprofits are members and can guide you to their most up to date needs.

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How to avoid 'sharenting' and other paparazzi parenting habits
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A recent study revealed parents often spend up to two hours staging a single photo of his or her child to post online. - photo by Amy Iverson
Before having kids, some people just dont appreciate their friends baby posts. But after having a child of their own, three fourths of new parents jump right on the parental social media bandwagon. If you have become a member of this group, there are some rules to follow for posting responsibly.

Much of a parents worry is how to teach their children to use social media responsibly. We talk with our kids about privacy, oversharing, and setting restrictions on their devices to keep them safe. But parents themselves need to look in the digital mirror once in a while. Before having children, it doesnt take as much effort to think about what to post online. Its up to us to decide what we share about our own lives. But once you become a parent, there are many questions to think about regarding what is appropriate to post about your kids on social media.

In a recent survey, kids clothing subscription company Mac and Mia surveyed 2000 new parents to find out how they are documenting their kids lives on social media, and what concerns they may have.

First of all, people without children seem to feel a bit differently about the onslaught of baby pictures online than those who are parents. 18 percent of people say before they had kids, they were annoyed by their friends baby posts. But after having children of their own, 73 percent admit they post progress pictures of their little ones every single month.

Not only are new parents letting the world know each time their baby is a month older, but they are posting about their kids every few days or so. Men and women report they post 6-7 times per month about their baby.

And while 70 percent of new parents say the benefit of using social media is how easy it is to help family and friends feel involved, there are some downsides. Here are a few tips to avoid the pitfall of becoming paparazzi parents.

Dont miss the moment

In the Mac and Mia survey, some parents admitted to spending up to two hours to get the perfect shot of their baby. That seems a little extreme. New and old parents alike should be careful about spending so much time taking pictures and videos that they dont enjoy the moment. Years ago, I decided to never live an experience through my phone. A study by Linda Henkel, a psychology professor at Fairfield University in Connecticut, found that when people took pictures of objects in an art museum, they didnt remember the objects as well as if they simply observed them.

This photo-taking impairment effect can happen to parents as well. If we are so consumed by getting the perfect photo, we can miss out on the moment all together, and our memory of it will suffer.

Dont forget about privacy

60 percent of couples say they have discussed rules and boundaries for posting their babys photos, according to the Mac and Mia survey. Even so, men are 34 percent more likely to publish baby posts on public accounts. If parents are concerned about their childrens privacy, keeping photos off of public accounts is a given.

In the Washington Post, Stacey Steinberg, a legal skills professor at the University of Florida, and Bahareh Keith, a Portland pediatrician, wrote that sharing too much information about kids online puts them at risk. They write that all that sharenting can make it easier for data thieves to target out kids for identity theft. Check that your privacy settings are where they should be and never share identifying information like full names and birth dates.

Dont be paparazzi parents

36 percent of parents say they take issue when their childs photo is posted online by someone else. Responsible social media users will always ask permission before posting a photo of another child. But parents should also think about whether their own children will take issue with their own posted photos a few years down the road.

When parents are constantly snapping pictures and throwing them on social media, it can be easy to forget to pause and make sure the post is appropriate. I always use the billboard example with my kids. I ask them to picture whatever they are posting going up on a billboard in our neighborhood. If they are okay with that, then their post is probably fine. Parents should ask themselves this same question when posting about their children. But they should also ask themselves if their child would be OK with this post on a billboard in 15 years. If it would cause embarrassment or humiliation, it might be best to keep it private.

Once children reach an appropriate age, parents should include them in the process of deciding what pictures are OK to post. Researchers at the University of Michigan surveyed 10- to 17-year-olds and found children believe their parents should ask permission more than parents think they should. The kids in the survey said sharing happy family moments, or accomplishments in sports, school and hobbies is fine. But when the post is negative (like when a child is disciplined) or embarrassing (think naked baby pictures or messy hair), kids say to keep it off social media.
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