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Men admit what they REALLY felt when they saw their baby for the first time
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Get ready to ugly cry. - photo by Melinda Fox
Because he hasn't been carrying your little one in his belly or experiencing trauma to birth her, your husband has a very different experience when it comes to meeting your new child. Here's what men on Reddit admitted to really thinking in that eventful moment when they met their baby.

Everything was worth it

"You realize that all ... you had to deal with in your life has led you up to that point, and it's all been worth it. This warm little bundle in your arms is the best thing you've ever done, and you can't imagine loving anything more."

No control over his emotions

"I had zero control over my emotions when my daughter was born in 2012. I cried and cried. I cried when I first saw her. I cried when the nurse who was doing her footprints grabbed my hand and gave me a "tattoo" with the remaining ink on her foot. I cried when the nurse told me I could walk outside into the waiting area and tell our parents that she was here. I cried when hospital personnel first congratulated me and called me 'dad.'"

She's the reason

"You look down and see a little hairy potato peeking out. You momentarily think, what is that? Then it hits you. This is the little bump in your wife that you've been reading stories to, or buying Italian food at 3 in the morning. This is the reason you've been going through all this stuff."

Welcomed into the crazy parts of fatherhood

"As soon as the nurse handed him to me, he pooped on me! This will always be my first memory of being welcomed to the world of fatherhood."

She's not mine

"It was bittersweet. I was giving her up for adoption and so when I held her, I had these fighting feelings of 'This isn't my child, it's theirs' and 'She's beautiful, this is my child, this is our child, she's perfect.' It was really hard letting her go. I haven't really told anyone this, so it's a bit hard for me to type it all out coherently. She was the perfect little baby, long and plump. But she wasn't mine. So yeah. It was rough."

So far so good

"First thought was 'no unibrow and no lazy eye, so far so good'."

He wanted to care for her

"It dawns on you that you created that. A feeling of warmth washes over you when you look at your child. You immediately feel protective, more so than you ever have in your life. It's been three minutes and you love something you just met more than anything you've ever known. You want to hold her, and protect her, keep her happy and healthy."

Nothing

"The interesting part is how long it took before I connected with him. This isn't to say I didn't care for him to this point, but it was like babysitting someone else's kids. He was probably 3 or more weeks old when I came home from work one day and picked him up. I held him flat on his back in front of me while leaning on the kitchen bar and looked at him. He smiled at me. It was real, not a burp or any other face, a smile. It changed me. He was happy to see me and it showed."

Terror that he'll repeat the same mistakes

"The doctor made a mistake and thought the ultrasound showed a girl. We prepared for a daughter for 7 months. Then when he came out, lo and behold... I had a son. At that moment I was absolutely terrified that I would repeat the (terrible) father/son relationship I had with my dad. I came to my senses a couple of hours later and realized that this was my chance to break the cycle of dysfunctional father/son relationships that had been going on in my family since the early 1900s. I spend every moment I can telling my son how much I love him, setting boundaries much of the time, breaking the rules some of the time and being present for him all of the time."

Unconditional love

"You are emotionally drained from watching your wife/SO go through labor, and for the first moments the baby is a bit like a difficult project you've finished, but you are too exhausted to admire. Then, as you and your SO recover from the ordeal of the delivery, together you start to introduce yourself to the new life you've created. At some point in those first few hours (at least with me) I felt the first completely and utterly unconditional love of my life."

Utter panic

"The worst panic attack of my life. Not only did I just become a dad but the room flooded with people and I had to go sit by myself in a corner and control my breathing."

A multitude of emotions

"I heard my daughter before I saw her, and my heart skipped and it's a flood of random emotions, fear and love and happiness. Then when I saw her I burst into tears. She was slimy and looked like a little old man, but I've never felt more love for another person in my life."

Editor's note: These comments have been edited for punctuation, spelling, capitalization, etc. in order to enhance readability.
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How to avoid 'sharenting' and other paparazzi parenting habits
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A recent study revealed parents often spend up to two hours staging a single photo of his or her child to post online. - photo by Amy Iverson
Before having kids, some people just dont appreciate their friends baby posts. But after having a child of their own, three fourths of new parents jump right on the parental social media bandwagon. If you have become a member of this group, there are some rules to follow for posting responsibly.

Much of a parents worry is how to teach their children to use social media responsibly. We talk with our kids about privacy, oversharing, and setting restrictions on their devices to keep them safe. But parents themselves need to look in the digital mirror once in a while. Before having children, it doesnt take as much effort to think about what to post online. Its up to us to decide what we share about our own lives. But once you become a parent, there are many questions to think about regarding what is appropriate to post about your kids on social media.

In a recent survey, kids clothing subscription company Mac and Mia surveyed 2000 new parents to find out how they are documenting their kids lives on social media, and what concerns they may have.

First of all, people without children seem to feel a bit differently about the onslaught of baby pictures online than those who are parents. 18 percent of people say before they had kids, they were annoyed by their friends baby posts. But after having children of their own, 73 percent admit they post progress pictures of their little ones every single month.

Not only are new parents letting the world know each time their baby is a month older, but they are posting about their kids every few days or so. Men and women report they post 6-7 times per month about their baby.

And while 70 percent of new parents say the benefit of using social media is how easy it is to help family and friends feel involved, there are some downsides. Here are a few tips to avoid the pitfall of becoming paparazzi parents.

Dont miss the moment

In the Mac and Mia survey, some parents admitted to spending up to two hours to get the perfect shot of their baby. That seems a little extreme. New and old parents alike should be careful about spending so much time taking pictures and videos that they dont enjoy the moment. Years ago, I decided to never live an experience through my phone. A study by Linda Henkel, a psychology professor at Fairfield University in Connecticut, found that when people took pictures of objects in an art museum, they didnt remember the objects as well as if they simply observed them.

This photo-taking impairment effect can happen to parents as well. If we are so consumed by getting the perfect photo, we can miss out on the moment all together, and our memory of it will suffer.

Dont forget about privacy

60 percent of couples say they have discussed rules and boundaries for posting their babys photos, according to the Mac and Mia survey. Even so, men are 34 percent more likely to publish baby posts on public accounts. If parents are concerned about their childrens privacy, keeping photos off of public accounts is a given.

In the Washington Post, Stacey Steinberg, a legal skills professor at the University of Florida, and Bahareh Keith, a Portland pediatrician, wrote that sharing too much information about kids online puts them at risk. They write that all that sharenting can make it easier for data thieves to target out kids for identity theft. Check that your privacy settings are where they should be and never share identifying information like full names and birth dates.

Dont be paparazzi parents

36 percent of parents say they take issue when their childs photo is posted online by someone else. Responsible social media users will always ask permission before posting a photo of another child. But parents should also think about whether their own children will take issue with their own posted photos a few years down the road.

When parents are constantly snapping pictures and throwing them on social media, it can be easy to forget to pause and make sure the post is appropriate. I always use the billboard example with my kids. I ask them to picture whatever they are posting going up on a billboard in our neighborhood. If they are okay with that, then their post is probably fine. Parents should ask themselves this same question when posting about their children. But they should also ask themselves if their child would be OK with this post on a billboard in 15 years. If it would cause embarrassment or humiliation, it might be best to keep it private.

Once children reach an appropriate age, parents should include them in the process of deciding what pictures are OK to post. Researchers at the University of Michigan surveyed 10- to 17-year-olds and found children believe their parents should ask permission more than parents think they should. The kids in the survey said sharing happy family moments, or accomplishments in sports, school and hobbies is fine. But when the post is negative (like when a child is disciplined) or embarrassing (think naked baby pictures or messy hair), kids say to keep it off social media.
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