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For Christians, its not always easy to deal with infidelity
No Caption - photo by Herb Scribner
Ashley Madison, a social network designed for people looking to have affairs, dominated the news last week, as hackers released a database of more than 1 million users who used the website, Vox reported. In some cases, this included users names, credit card info and message logs, according to Vox.

Christianity Today editor Ed Stetzer wrote this week that hes spoken with pastors, community members and friends who have asked questions about infidelity. Some Christians he spoke to said they even used Ashley Madison to have affairs, and they were worried about their spiritual future, he said.

Infidelity isnt exactly an easy topic for Christians, since Ashley Madison promotes adultery a sin and seen by many to be highly immoral. But experts have weighed in on what Christians can do to help themselves and their community combat infidelity and avoid it in the future.

For example, Stetzer said Christians shouldnt bury themselves and wallow in grief if someone they know or they themselves have used the website. Rather, believers should realize that infidelity isnt necessarily a personal problem, but a societal one, and work to combat the popular culture, Stetzer wrote.

Modern culture is hyper-sexualized, he wrote, so Christians would do well to use their time to promote a sexual revolution that makes society focus on the eternal aspects of life like love, marriage and Gods will.

Some Christians have started doing this by combating pornography, according to Vox. Many Christians believe pornography addiction can lead to adultery and increased infidelity, Vox reported.

Stetzer also wrote that Christians, whether they used Ashley Madison or know somebody who did, should also remember that God is willing to forgive, as long as individuals repent and understand their mistakes.

So, if you are on the list, or know someone who is, a key word is repentance, and there is a word that comes after that forgiveness, Stetzer wrote. That will not free us from consequences, but it does point us to Jesus. He is able to lead us past the pain and lies of Ashley Madison and into the grace and truth he provides. The other way the way of the sexual revolution is on display this week. It's how our culture has decided to go. But Jesus shows a better way. Life is eternal. Don't have an affair.

But forgiveness and spreading a new message about sexuality arent the only answers for Christians if they want to avoid infidelity in the future. In some cases, combating infidelity may start in the home.

John Pavolovitz, a pastor from North Carolina, wrote for Relevant magazine that infidelity issues can creep up in a marriage when partners dont feel secure with each other.

To avoid this, Christians may also want to consider how honest they are with their spouse when it comes to using social media and technology, Pavolovitz wrote.

Pavolovitz said the Internet can lead people to empty tonics for serious heartsickness, which is to say, it can offer people hollow opportunities to cure their relationship insecurities and troubles.

But if partners allow each other to look through their passwords, social media accounts and personal messages, they can establish security and trust with each other, which will help them avoid the tonics and vices that lead to infidelity, Pavolovitz wrote.

Some argue that all of this equals a loss of something on my behalf; a sacrifice of personal freedom or individuality, he wrote. In some ways, I agree, but for me, these things are at the very heart of what marriage is made of and why I chose to enter into that collaborative covenant partnership in the first place. Marriage is a willing sacrifice. It is an intentional compromise. It is the welcomed alteration of a person as they are alone, as they commit to be part of something else, together with another.
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