By allowing ads to appear on this site, you support the local businesses who, in turn, support great journalism.
Common new mom mistakes that arent mistakes at all
5d0087aeae9d0f0b8454aac46663fa60cbb4b6574be618007bbcea6f9a8e1a93
When you're a new mom it can be hard to know what is the right and wrong thing to do with your baby. Here are 5 common mistakes that aren't mistakes at all. - photo by Megan Shauri
When a new baby comes into your life you may feel overwhelmed, overjoyed and under qualified for the job. There is so much to learn and so many new experiences you will go through. You may make some mistakes, and that is okay. But not every mistake needs correcting. Here are five mistakes that are not mistakes at all:

1. Worrying too much

Moms worry. Its what we do. We are now responsible for another life. These little ones are 100% dependent on us for their care and survival. It is natural to worry we may be doing something wrong, or that we are not interpreting a cough or sneeze the right way. Dont feel bad for calling the doctor 5 times a week or Googling every symptom your baby is exhibiting. Its okay. Every new mom does it.

2. Not buying everything on the must-have list

As a new mom, you may not be sure what you do and do not need on the recommended baby registry list. Are you really going to use a bottle warmer? Do you really need a play mat, bouncer, jumper, exercauser and swing? It can be a bit overwhelming when you look at the list of items and feel like you have to buy them all or your babys life will not be complete.

Dont worry about. You can always buy these items after the baby has arrived. You can also find gently used items or have a neighbor or friend loan you theirs to see if your baby even likes/needs it before forking over a large sum of money on something your baby will use once or twice or not at all.

Ask around for what people felt were their must-have items, and then decide what is essential and what can wait. Dont beat yourself up for not having every item on the list. I guarantee you dont need 5 different kinds of entertainment systems for your newborn.

3. Not breastfeeding/not using formula

Nowadays it seems that if you dont breastfeed your child then you are not giving them the best start. Or, you hear without breastmilk they will have problems later in life, and it must mean you are a lazy mom. Dont listen to these claims!

Everyone has their own story and set of circumstances. You do what is best for you and your baby. I tried breastfeeding my twins, and it did not work out. Everyone was miserable and no one was getting the rest and nutrients they needed, so we switched to formula. It was the best decision ever. Did I feel guilty that I wasnt breastfeeding even though it was not by any fault of my own? Yes. It wasnt until I had more experience as a mom, saw how they were thriving on formula and realized in the grand scheme of things it doesnt really matter how they were fed, as long as they were fed.

On the flip side, I was able to breastfeed my third baby. It just worked. But, I would get looks and feel like I was being indecent when I was breastfeeding out in public (if I used a cover or not). I started to wonder if I should be bottle feeding in public instead of using my breast. Bottom line: no matter what way you decide to go, someone will have an opinion and issue with it. Just focus on what is best for you and your baby. Ignore the rest.

4. Flooding your social media with pictures

It is natural to take one million pictures of your baby and of course want to share them with the world. A lot of moms apologize for flooding their social media accounts with pictures of their baby, and they shouldnt be sorry. As long as you are being careful and have the correct security settings, go for it. Your friends are following you because they care about your life and if they really are tired of seeing pictures of your baby, they can choose to unfollow you. Years from now you will look back at those pictures and be sad that you didnt post more!

5. Not leaving the house for 3 months

New moms may feel guilty that they are saying no to social obligations and not accepting many visitors those first few months of a babys life. Dont. This is a very special time for you and your newborn.

You are getting to know each other and adjusting to a major life change. Cherish that time. Be selfish with your time. Five years from now you will not miss the opportunity you turned down to help with the PTA, but you will miss being able to gaze into your babys eyes and see them recognize you for the first time. Spend as much time as possible with your newborn, the time goes quickly and youll never get it back.

Welcoming a new baby into your home is an amazing and trying time. Of all the things going on, worrying about these mistakes is not worth the time and energy you will put into it. Just enjoy your time and soak up every moment, good or bad.
Sign up for our E-Newsletters
How to avoid 'sharenting' and other paparazzi parenting habits
ce406c66b9871a104ac24256a687e4821d75680dcfc89d9e5398939543f7f88f
A recent study revealed parents often spend up to two hours staging a single photo of his or her child to post online. - photo by Amy Iverson
Before having kids, some people just dont appreciate their friends baby posts. But after having a child of their own, three fourths of new parents jump right on the parental social media bandwagon. If you have become a member of this group, there are some rules to follow for posting responsibly.

Much of a parents worry is how to teach their children to use social media responsibly. We talk with our kids about privacy, oversharing, and setting restrictions on their devices to keep them safe. But parents themselves need to look in the digital mirror once in a while. Before having children, it doesnt take as much effort to think about what to post online. Its up to us to decide what we share about our own lives. But once you become a parent, there are many questions to think about regarding what is appropriate to post about your kids on social media.

In a recent survey, kids clothing subscription company Mac and Mia surveyed 2000 new parents to find out how they are documenting their kids lives on social media, and what concerns they may have.

First of all, people without children seem to feel a bit differently about the onslaught of baby pictures online than those who are parents. 18 percent of people say before they had kids, they were annoyed by their friends baby posts. But after having children of their own, 73 percent admit they post progress pictures of their little ones every single month.

Not only are new parents letting the world know each time their baby is a month older, but they are posting about their kids every few days or so. Men and women report they post 6-7 times per month about their baby.

And while 70 percent of new parents say the benefit of using social media is how easy it is to help family and friends feel involved, there are some downsides. Here are a few tips to avoid the pitfall of becoming paparazzi parents.

Dont miss the moment

In the Mac and Mia survey, some parents admitted to spending up to two hours to get the perfect shot of their baby. That seems a little extreme. New and old parents alike should be careful about spending so much time taking pictures and videos that they dont enjoy the moment. Years ago, I decided to never live an experience through my phone. A study by Linda Henkel, a psychology professor at Fairfield University in Connecticut, found that when people took pictures of objects in an art museum, they didnt remember the objects as well as if they simply observed them.

This photo-taking impairment effect can happen to parents as well. If we are so consumed by getting the perfect photo, we can miss out on the moment all together, and our memory of it will suffer.

Dont forget about privacy

60 percent of couples say they have discussed rules and boundaries for posting their babys photos, according to the Mac and Mia survey. Even so, men are 34 percent more likely to publish baby posts on public accounts. If parents are concerned about their childrens privacy, keeping photos off of public accounts is a given.

In the Washington Post, Stacey Steinberg, a legal skills professor at the University of Florida, and Bahareh Keith, a Portland pediatrician, wrote that sharing too much information about kids online puts them at risk. They write that all that sharenting can make it easier for data thieves to target out kids for identity theft. Check that your privacy settings are where they should be and never share identifying information like full names and birth dates.

Dont be paparazzi parents

36 percent of parents say they take issue when their childs photo is posted online by someone else. Responsible social media users will always ask permission before posting a photo of another child. But parents should also think about whether their own children will take issue with their own posted photos a few years down the road.

When parents are constantly snapping pictures and throwing them on social media, it can be easy to forget to pause and make sure the post is appropriate. I always use the billboard example with my kids. I ask them to picture whatever they are posting going up on a billboard in our neighborhood. If they are okay with that, then their post is probably fine. Parents should ask themselves this same question when posting about their children. But they should also ask themselves if their child would be OK with this post on a billboard in 15 years. If it would cause embarrassment or humiliation, it might be best to keep it private.

Once children reach an appropriate age, parents should include them in the process of deciding what pictures are OK to post. Researchers at the University of Michigan surveyed 10- to 17-year-olds and found children believe their parents should ask permission more than parents think they should. The kids in the survey said sharing happy family moments, or accomplishments in sports, school and hobbies is fine. But when the post is negative (like when a child is disciplined) or embarrassing (think naked baby pictures or messy hair), kids say to keep it off social media.
Latest Obituaries